You Can't Go Home Again
by Xodarap
Summary: Xander's frustration about being the Zeppo finally comes to a head mid season 4, so he takes off intent on proving himself to those he feels don't believe in him. He comes to some realizations on his own, and he makes some new friends in the FBI. But a series of murders in Sunnydale forces Xander to come home sooner then he would have liked.


**You Can't Go Home Again**

 _ **Author: Paradox761**_

 _ **Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy or Profiler, and I don't claim to. No copyright infringement is intended so please don't sue. I don't have any money anyway. Also, let me say that I know absolutely nothing about the Wicca religion. Everything in this story has either come from things I've observed on Buffy and other TV shows, or from my own mind (Yes, that's right, I just made it up. Deal with it). No offense is intended.**_

 _ **Summary: Xander's frustration about being the Zeppo finally comes to a head mid season 4, so he takes off intent on proving himself to those he feels don't believe in him. He comes to some realizations on his own, and he makes some new friends in the FBI. But a series of murders in Sunnydale forces Xander to come home sooner then he would have liked. Can he use his newfound wisdom to patch things up with his old friends while keeping the secret truth about vampires from his new friends, all while trying to catch a killer?**_

 _ **(BtVS/Profiler, W/X)**_

 _ **December 17, 1999**_

"What!"

"It's just...I mean, I don't really think that we're right for each other."

"You're breaking up with me! How can you do this!" She shot up from her seat on the couch.

"Anya, please calm down. Let me try and explain."

"Oh, you don't need to explain. You're just a typical man, you just used me for physical gratification. I guess I should have known this was coming. Ooh, you are so lucky I don't have my powers anymore..."

"Anya please, it isn't anything like that. Can I please try and explain." She sat back down, but she wouldn't look at him. "When we went to the prom together, I'll be honest, it was because no one else would go with me. I mean, former vengeance demon with a grudge against men wouldn't have been my first choice for a date. But it turned out good. Great actually, I had a wonderful time that evening. For the first time in a long time I felt normal again. I was finally starting to let go of all the animosity I had towards Cordeila, but I was starting to question myself. I realized that Cordy and I weren't meant to be, and I started wondering if I was meant to be with anyone. That night, we talked and danced, and I had fun for the first time in a long time, apart from all the stories of torture and mutilation of adulterous men throughout the ages of course."

She smiled a little bit at that. "I was just trying to make conversation," she mumbled.

Xander smiled back. "You were there for me at a time when I really needed someone. And then, before the Ascension when you came back for me, I was really touched. I know it might not have seemed like it at the time, but I knew you were still new to humanity. I knew you had all these feelings you were trying to sort out. I'll admit, there was a part of me that was very tempted by your offer, but I just couldn't leave my friends. And then you came back, and all of this just kind of happened. So fast that it took me by surprise. Suddenly, I had somebody that cared about me, and I cared about them too. It was new to both of us. Anya, I just think that we fell together for the wrong reasons. I know that you care about me, but these are the first feelings of humanity you've had for eleven hundred years. It's easy to let yourself be carried away by them. Deep down, I don't think you're in love with me. And I love you, but I'm not in love with you. I guess in a way you were right. I was being a typical male. I was in an intimate relationship for the first time in my life, and I let myself get carried away by those feelings too. But it isn't fair to either of us. I'm sorry Anya."

Xander's voice was clearly pained. And where Anya's first instinct had been anger, she could hear the torment in his voice. She reached up and wiped a tear from her eye. She turned back to look at him again, and for the last time she gazed deeply into his chocolate brown eyes. "Goodbye Xander," she said softly. She leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. Then she stood, and ascended the stairs out of the basement.

Xander reached up and wiped a tear from his own eye. It was the right thing to do, he knew that, but it still hurt. He did care for Anya, but he wasn't being fair to her. His heart did, and always would truly belong to someone else. "Goodbye Anya."

8888888

Buffy was getting ready to make her second sweep of the campus when she heard a rustling behind her. She clutched Mr. Pointy firmly and spun around expecting an attack. What she saw instead was Xander, backpedaling and tripping over his own feet when he saw the slayer in battle mode.

"Buffy, it's me!" he said as he hit the ground.

"Jesus, Xander! You scared the crap out of me, I could have killed you!"

"Sorry Buff," he said returning to his feet again.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

Xander looked slightly hurt by the question, but he shrugged it off. "I just thought I'd drop by. You know, help you out on patrol or something," he said in his normal lighthearted voice.

Buffy smiled like it was a joke. "Well, thanks anyway Xander, but I think I'll be okay."

This time Xander didn't even try to hide his hurt expression, but Buffy didn't notice anyway. "Do you mind if I tag along anyway?" he asked.

"I guess so," she said turning her back on him. "Just try and stay out of trouble, okay?"

Xander followed behind her as she started walking again. "Sure," he said softly. They walked a while in silence, it was a quiet night. Buffy sighed a few times, and Xander took it as boredom. "Slow night," he said.

"Yeah," she answered. "It's been like this a lot lately."

More silence. "Anya and I decided to break it off," Xander said. He purposefully didn't mention who broke it off with who, he was curious to see what Buffy would say.

"Well, I hate to say I told you so..."

"Then don't," Xander interrupted.

She glanced at him oddly. "She dumped you, huh?"

Xander smiled an ironic smile. He had expected this reaction. "Why do you say that?" he asked with seriousness.

"Well, it's just that...I mean..."

"You mean that I couldn't have possibly broken it off, because as long as I'm gettin' some on a regular basis, I don't care about the quality of the relationship. Same old Xander, thinking with his dick and not his brain. Is that about the size of it?" Buffy just stared at him. "Is it that inconceivable that I could have matured some over the last three years?" Silence. "On second thought, don't answer that."

"I'm...I'm sorry Xander," Buffy finally stumbled out. "I didn't mean anything by it."

"I know Buffy," Xander said softer. "I'm sorry I snapped at you. I guess I've just been a little edgy lately." The walked a little further in silence. "It's just that...well, I realized that we weren't really right for each other. I mean, I do care about her. I just think that maybe we got together for the wrong reasons. She took it pretty well actually. I think she understood."

"So you were the one to break things off?"

"Yeah," he answered simply.

"So, what were the wrong reasons?"

"Hmm?"

"You said you got together for the wrong reasons, what were they?"

Xander was about to answer when he turned to Buffy instead. "Do you really want to know?"

"Sure," she said.

"Well, we were both at a kind of lonely time in our lives. I think we just relished the intimacy. But it never really felt right, at least not to me. She wasn't..." he trailed off.

"She wasn't what?"

"She wasn't the one," he answered in a whisper. "The one person for which the world ceases to exist when you're with them." He paused. "True love."

"I don't think I believe in true love anymore," Buffy said.

"Oh, but you have to Buff. It might not always be easy, but it's always true. And you always know it when you find it." Xander paused again. "Sometimes it feels like it would have been easier if you hadn't. That way you don't know what you're missing when it's gone."

"I think I understand."

"I thought you might," Xander said.

"You're talking about Cordelia."

Xander frowned. "Or you might not," he said finishing his previous thought.

Buffy was about to ask him what he meant, when she was distracted by a vampire jumping out right in front of them. Xander took a step back, letting Buffy do her thing. But the vampire got the jump on her. It backhanded her across the face before she could even pull out her stake. She recovered quickly enough. She swept his legs from under him and flipped backwards onto her feet to get some distance between them. The vampire scrambled to his feet. He growled fiercely, and saliva dripped from his mouth. "Ick, get a towel," the slayer quipped as she launched her next assault. What she didn't see was the second vampire behind her. He grabbed her shoulder and threw her to the ground. Soon she had two vamps on top of her, and she was fighting them both for control. A second later, the second vamp wasn't on top of her anymore, and the other one was looking to see what had happened. That was all the opening Buffy needed to land a few vicious punches to her opponent. She managed to get out form underneath him. She turned again and delivered a fierce kick to his midsection. Then she spun around and plunged her stake into his chest before he could recover. He turned to ash and Buffy let out a sigh of relief. She turned to see what had happened to the second vampire, and saw him grappling with Xander on the sidewalk. "Xander!" she yelled as she ran over to him. She kicked the vampire in the face and it flew off of him. She jumped on top of it and staked it in a second, leaving nothing but dust.

"Thanks Buff," Xander said, trying to catch his breath.

"Damn it Xander! I told you to stay back, you could have gotten killed!"

Xander was a bit taken aback, but he responded immediately. "And so could you! What, would you rather I hadn't tackled him and let them both kill you?"

"I could have handled it!" she yelled back.

Xander stayed silent for a moment. "Fine," he said it just above a whisper. He turned around and started to head off. "I'll see you later Buff," he said.

Buffy could hear the hurt in his voice, but she didn't understand. She was just trying to protect him. 'But that's all he was trying to do too,' a voice inside her said. 'Protect you. And you yelled at him. You didn't even say thank you.' Buffy shrugged of her conscience's voice, even though she knew it was right. "I'll talk to him tomorrow," she said to herself as she started to head back to her dorm. "There's always tomorrow."

8888888

Xander was walking home, his hands tucked deeply into his pockets, when he heard a twig snap behind him. He slowly pulled his hands out of his pockets. He had a stake up his sleeve, his wrist bent back and the point of the stake resting in his palm. He could hear footsteps now against the pavement behind him. He whirled around and saw a vampire with his game face on, growling at him. "Oh my god! Please don't hurt me! I'll give you whatever you want!" Xander crouched down on the sidewalk, rolling up into a fetal ball, but his feet were still on the pavement. He watched from between his crossed arms as the vampire approached slowly, a wicked grin on his hideous face. Fear was like an aphrodisiac to vampires, Xander knew that. Finally, when the vampire was close enough, he reached down and grabbed Xander's head forcefully and pulled it up from where it rested on his crossed arms. At that exact moment, Xander lunged forward and plunged his stake into the heart of the unsuspecting bloodsucker. The vampire had a half a second before he was dust. He looked at Xander in utter shock. Xander just smiled as he exploded into ash. "They fall for it every time," he said to himself as he replaced his stake up his sleeve. He turned back on his path, and continued walking.

8888888

Xander walked into the Bronze and scanned the crowd. As usual, things were hopping. A band played on stage and the dance floor was packed with teenagers dancing and having a good time. Xander was surprised when he spotted Willow seated alone on the couch closest to the stage. It was their usual spot, one they had taken up so she could watch Oz when he played. In fact, the way she looked at the stage almost reminded Xander of those days. The only difference was that the once cheerful smile of a happy girlfriend had been replaced with the forlorn gaze of a woman with a broken heart. Just seeing her like this made Xander feel as though someone had ripped out his own heart and stomped on it, it killed him. He approached the couch. "Hey Willow," he said just loud enough to be heard over the music. "I didn't expect to see you here tonight."

She looked up. "Oh, hey Xander," she said distantly. He could tell that her thoughts were a million miles away, and it didn't take a genius to figure out on what, and on whom they were centered. Xander just sat down next to his best friend in silence. Her gaze wandered up to the stage again. Xander looked to see if he knew the band, he didn't.

He waited until the music ended and the room was a bit quieter before he spoke. "So, Willow, how's college life treating you?"

"Hmm?" she looked back at him. "Oh, okay I guess."

They were both silent again, until Xander spoke. "Actually I'm glad I ran into you tonight, I wanted to talk to you."

"What about?"

"I want to apologize for the way I've been acting recently. I mean, you're going through this time in your life, and you need your friends around you. I haven't exactly been very supportive lately." He paused. "I haven't been a very good friend."

"Oh, Xander. It's not your fault. You have your own life to live, you don't have to apologize for that."

"But I do Wills. And I don't just mean since your breakup with Oz. We haven't been the same for a while. I mean, we used to be best friends. We used to hang out all the time, have fun. We used to call each other every night and just talk for hours." He paused. "I miss that Will."

"That happens Xander. We grew up, other people came into our lives. That's just how things go."

Xander knew that she didn't really understand what he was trying to say. Yes, they did grow apart. And yes, maybe that was the way most childhood friendships went. But what he was trying to say was that he didn't want that to happen to them. Willow was his best friend, and no matter how many other people entered his life, she always would be. He had hoped that she felt the same, but he was becoming doubtful. "I guess so," he mumbled. "But you're still my best friend Wills. I don't think that will ever change."

"I know, and you're my friend too." She paused for a moment. "Maybe neither one of us have been very good friends to each other recently. We've been through a lot lately, it'll get better."

"Sure," Xander said softly, but his tone indicated that he was anything but. It was true, they had been through a lot recently, but they'd been through a lot in the last three and a half years too, that didn't mean anything. They were always still friends. Things like that were supposed to make the bonds of friendship stronger, not push people further apart. Xander could feel it ever since he had returned from his little road trip during the summer. They were all growing up, but they were leaving him behind. He couldn't be the same old Xander and still remain in their lives. But at the same time, he couldn't change, because they couldn't accept that he could be anything other than what he was. The goofball, the comic relief. The Zeppo. It wasn't anything he felt he could blame them for though. It wasn't their fault.

8888888

Xander walked home in silence that night. He was almost hoping for a vampire to jump out, or a car to swerve and hit a tree, or a thunderstorm to start and drench him in a downpour. Anything so that he wouldn't have to be alone with his thoughts. But he wasn't so lucky. What the hell was he doing here? They didn't need him here. Buffy didn't need him, he was just in the way. Willow didn't need him, she had grown past him. She had Buffy now to do the best friend thing. And even though he could hold his own, he wasn't exactly impressing anyone with his mad slaying skills. Almost everyday now one of his parents would say something. What are you going to do with your life? Are you going to live in the basement and work odd jobs forever? They were right. He didn't have anything keeping him here. His parents had saved some money for him, in hopes of college. But since he didn't get in anywhere, they were willing to give it to him to help him start his life, if he'd only make a decision as to what he wanted to do. By the time Xander reached his house that night, he had made a decision. If he wanted to change his life, then he had to act. Surprisingly, the preparations weren't that many. He talked to his parents, packed a few things into his car, and by the next afternoon, Sunnydale was just a distant memory. He thought about going to his friends first, to tell them he was leaving. But he was too afraid that they'd talk him out of it, that he'd loose his nerve and change his mind. He couldn't afford for that to happen. This was his chance to prove to them, to prove to everyone that he could be something more. He couldn't be the Zeppo forever. Even if they didn't believe in him, he believed in himself. And that was all he needed.

8888888

 _ **Except from the journal of AleXander LaVelle Harris  
August 2, 2005**_

It's been almost six years since I left Sunnydale, and my life is very different. I'll admit, at first my decision to leave was a bit of a hasty one, but I still believe it was the right one. In the beginning, I was still reeling from all the emotional problems that had caused me to leave in the first place, so I wasn't exactly on the right track. I wandered around a bit, working at jobs I hated and barely making enough money to afford food and rent. I considered going back home, but I realized something. Everyone back home was already expecting me to fail. They thought that poor, immature Xander would go out into the real world, see how hard it was, and come home with his tail between his legs. And the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to prove them wrong. I'd faced vampires and demons alike, I could handle this. So I sat down and started asking myself some hard questions. What do I want to do with my life? What am I passionate about? What are my goals? What do I have to do to achieve those goals?

So at the tender age of nineteen, I took all the money I had left and I used it to move clear across the country. All the way to Virginia. Quantico, Virginia to be precise. Yes, that's right, I joined the FBI. I know that it sounds kind of odd, but it seemed perfect for me. When I asked myself what I want to do with my life, what am I passionate about, I kept coming back to one thing. I want to help people. I know from first hand experience that life can suck beyond the telling of it, and if there's one thing I missed about living in Sunnydale, it was making a difference. Even if it was just a small difference. So, I took a job to support myself while I attended the FBI Academy, and I worked my ass off. Between my job and the Academy, I had just enough time left in the day to pass out from exhaustion, and then drag my ass out of bed a scant six hours later to do it all over again. Needless to say during that time in my life, I wasn't a very pleasant person, but I was determined. I was determined not to fail. If I ever did decide to go home again, I wanted it to be as a success. To show everyone what I could do.

Now, the best part was that it wasn't long before I started working for the Bureau and getting paid for it, even though my training was far from over. At the Academy, I majored in Weapons and Tactics, putting all that soldier boy experience to good use. I thought that between that, and the small amount of training I did with Buffy, it would be a breeze. Man, was I ever wrong. But I stuck to it, and when it was all said and done, I came out a new man. How new, well let's just say I know sixteen different ways to kill a man with a ballpoint pen. Okay, I'm just kidding about that. What I really learned was how to fight and how to strategize, along with extensive firearms training. Once I entered the field though, I transferred to the Behavioral Sciences Unit. I thought that since I spent so much time fighting demons in high school, I should learn a thing or two about what makes the human mind tick. That's where I met Rachel Burke; she was the instructor for the orientation class set up for new agents. From her I learned more about the human mind then I thought possible. She had quite a gift of insight. We ended up becoming friends. In fact she was my first real friend since Sunnydale. Unfortunately however, our time together was short. It wasn't long after I met her that she was assigned to the Violent Crimes Task Force in order to solve the kidnapping of Dr. Samantha Waters. And after Dr. Waters was recovered and the infamous serial killer 'Jack of All Trades' was killed, Rachel stayed on as the team's profiler. I remained in the Behavioral Sciences Unit for a while after that, working cases and keeping my skills sharp. But even though I was finally starting to feel good about myself and the life I had made, I felt like there was something missing.

It was at that point that I realized I hadn't seen a vampire or a demon in years. I hadn't even thought about it. It was like, as soon as I entered the real world, I totally forgot. I became one of those people I used to be so angry about for not seeing the truth when it was right in front of them. It was about this time when I saw a story in the newspaper about a serial killer down in Miami. I had heard that the VCTF was on the case, so I decided to check it out. Well, after reading the article, my curiosity was definitely peaked. It seemed that the press was blaming the crimes on a satanic cult or something, because of some odd markings found near the bodies. So I started looking into the actual evidence and reports over the FBI's computer network, and the deeper I got into it, the surer I was that the person they were looking for was not a person at all. The bodies were so badly mangled that it had been originally thought to be an animal attack, and I managed to trace the markings to an ancient text that spoke of a prophecy of a demon, reeking havoc throughout one major city at a time, brutally committing murders. I knew that this demon wouldn't be caught by the FBI through conventional means, and I knew that I was the only that could do anything about it. So I caught a plane to Miami.

Once there I realized that I wouldn't be able to conduct an investigation and track this demon down without the VCTF noticing, but I tried anyway. Sooner or later, our paths crossed and I had to explain to the head of the VCTF, Agent Bailey Malone, what I was doing there. I knew I couldn't tell him the truth, he would think I was crazy and my short career in the FBI would be over. So I told him an amended version of the truth. Instead of telling him that this was a demon fulfilling a prophecy, I told him that it was a man who thought he was a demon fulfilling a prophecy. From that standpoint, all of my evidence was still valid, and it also appeared to match the profile that Rachel had created. The truth is, if it hadn't been for her vouching for me in front of Bailey, I probably would have been disciplined for not following procedures and on the next plane back to DC. Using Rachel's profile and my research, we ended up one step ahead of the demon. We got to him before he got to his next victim. Of course, he wouldn't be taken alive, and of course, he didn't reveal himself as a demon, but I knew the truth.

The team was so impressed with my work, and with Rachel's recommendation, that I became assigned to the VCTF full time, and that's where I am today, over a year later. I feel like I've finally found my place now. Everyone on this team has a job, a specialty. Most of the time, my more conventional skills are the ones that are called upon, my skills with weapons and tactics. Whenever the shit hits the fan, I'm usually there on the front line with a SWAT team coordinating the efforts. But my skills as 'Research Boy' have also come in handy more than once, especially when it comes to the occult. The fact is that ninety percent of the time, it's an ordinary, run-of-the-mill, psychotic human being that we're after. But that other ten percent, those were the cases they weren't clearing before I showed up. Those were the vampires, the werewolves, the demons, and the other assorted things that go bump in the night. The rest of the team still doesn't know anything about the truth though. It's like a natural reflex, the way their minds just won't accept things unless the proof is right in front of them, and even then, they usually don't see it. Sometimes I wish I was ignorant too, but that's the price you pay for growing up on the Hellmouth. The truth is, I'm an asset to this team because of my knowledge and because of the experiences I've had in Sunnydale. So I guess I wouldn't have it any other way.

So, all in all, not a bad life. I have good friends, a job I love and the chance to help people everyday. So, why haven't I gone back to Sunnydale? Why haven't I even told anyone there where I am or what I do now? I guess I'm afraid. Even though I haven't seen any of them for six years, they're still the people I care about. The people whose opinions I care about too. The fact is, I ran away from that life when things got too tough, and as much as I wish they would understand, I don't think they will. Maybe someday I'll have my chance to try and explain it all to them. I've come to a few realizations in the past few years, especially when it comes to Willow. She was my best friend, and what hurts me the most is to think that I left at a time when she needed me the most. But, in my mind, I was already losing her. We were growing apart everyday. We used to be each other's everything, but then Buffy came into our lives and things got much more complicated. I never realized how much Willow meant to me until she wasn't in my life anymore. More than anything I want the opportunity to make it up to her for all the mistakes I made, but again the fear comes in. Not the fear of seeing her, but the fear that she won't want to see me. And maybe that's why I don't go back, because I'm afraid of being rejected again. Not by the best friend that I left behind, by the woman she is now. The woman I've come to realize I love. But hopefully, this is something I won't have to worry about it for a while yet.

8888888

Xander sat in his office, trying to finish up some paperwork before the morning briefing when he heard a knock on his door. He looked up to see Bailey Malone standing in the doorway. "Xander," He said.

Xander took the half a piece of doughnut out of his mouth before he answered. "Hey Bailey, yeah I know, briefing in ten minutes. I just wanted to finish up these reports. If I had to pick one thing about this job that I hated it would be the paperwork."

"I know what you mean," Bailey said as he stepped closer. "Actually, there's something I wanted to talk to you about before the meeting."

"Oh?" Xander asked. He motioned for Bailey to sit as he pushed his papers aside to give his boss his undivided attention. "What's up?"

"Well, I remembered something you once told me about your home town. How you weren't exactly in a hurry to get back there."

Xander looked slightly confused. He was sure he must have mentioned something in passing, but he didn't know what that had to do with anything. "I suppose that's true," Xander said. "I kind of left a lot of people behind under some...well, unfriendly circumstances. Why do you ask?"

"What was the name of that town again?" Bailey asked.

"Sunnydale, California," Xander answered, not liking where the conversation was heading. "Why?"

"I'm sorry Xander, but it would appear that our most recent case..."

"Oh no," Xander said cutting him off. He hung his head a little. "I knew this would happen someday."

"Xander, I'll understand if you'd rather not go. If you'd like, you could stay in Atlanta..."

"No," Xander said, cutting him off again. "I have a responsibility to the Bureau, and I've sworn to never let my personal life interfere with that. I always knew I'd go back someday, I just didn't expect it to be so soon. You can count on me Bailey."

Bailey smiled. "I was hoping you'd say that, because it appears as though this case is right up you're alley. We're going to need you on this one." Bailey nodded to him one last time, then left his office to head down to the main conference table.

"I suspected as much," Xander said to himself. Somehow, he always knew that he'd end up back in Sunnydale on business. Buffy couldn't take care of everything that went bump in the night, there was bound to be some spill over. In fact, he was surprised that it took the VCTF this long to go to Sunnydale. Xander just shook his head, grabbed the last of his doughnut and headed out off his office and to the briefing.

"Okay, this is what we know so far," Bailey started as the members of the team sat around the main conference table. "There have been three murders in the small town of Sunnydale, California over the last two weeks."

"Three?" John Grant asked. "And we're just getting the call now?"

"That's probably the oddest part," Bailey said. "The only reason we got the call at all was because an agent from the Los Angeles field office happened to run across the story in a local paper. The local police department hasn't contacted any outside agency, even though they seem a bit overwhelmed.

"Well, the Sunnydale PD always was a little inept," Xander said. He looked up to see the rest of the group looking at him. "Hometown," he said.

"Anyway," Bailey continued. "Each victim was attacked and killed with a single stab wound through the heart." He turned to look at the big scream as the crime scene photos flashed up. "They all had defensive wounds, but it appears like the first one put up the most struggle. The other two seem to have been attacked from behind."

"So the killer is new at this," Rachel said. "He's learning as he goes."

Xander leaned forward with a slightly confused look on his face. "George, can you put the stats up on the first vic?" he asked.

"Sure thing," George answered from his usual seat behind the computer. He typed in a few commands and the image on the large screen at the head of the table changed to that of a recent photo of the victim beside her personal information.

Xander slipped on a pair of glasses as he looked up. "She's 5'4" and about a hundred pounds soaking wet," Xander said reading from the screen. "Even if she saw the attack coming, how much of a struggle could she have put up?"

"So, what? We're looking for a small man?" John asked.

"Or a woman," Rachel said. "What else do we know?"

"Well, all three victims are women, early to mid twenties. They're physical appearances don't appear to follow any pattern. Different hair colors, eye colors, build," Bailey said.

"What about the knife?" Rachel asked.

"Grace?" Bailey asked, turning to the woman to his right.

"Well, the autopsy reports aren't very thorough. It would appear that the Sunnydale Coroner's Office is as inept as the Police Department. All I can tell you is that the blade is triangular, about six inches long. The second two victims both received blows to the backs of their heads, and there are other wounds that would indicate a slight struggle, but only a single stab wound, directly through the heart."

Xander hemmed and hawed a little before he asked his next question, but he felt he had to. "Are you sure it was a knife Grace, I mean you said the reports weren't very thorough. Could it have been say, a wooden stake."

They all looked at him oddly, but Grace answered. "No, they were definitely knife wounds. I could tell as much myself from the autopsy photos. A stake would be more rounded, it would leave a bigger wound if it were thrust in that far." Xander nodded.

"There's more," Bailey said. "Near each victim, a symbol was found drawn with chalk. Twice on the street, and once on the side of a building." Xander looked up as the screen to see three images of the symbol. It was a circle with a pentagram drawn inside of it. Throughout the symbol were also drawn many smaller symbols, each within one of the chambers created by the star shape. Xander leaned in to look closer. "Do you recognize it Xander?" Bailey asked.

"It's a Wiccan circle," he said. "They're used for many things in the Wicca religion, everything from protection spells to curses. I'd have to look into the meanings of all the smaller symbols to get the particular meaning of this circle, but that shouldn't be too hard."

Bailey nodded. "What do you think Rachel?" he asked, turning to her.

"Well, I'd say the killer is a woman, white, 20 to 30. She has a strong belief in the occult, she may even believe herself to be a witch. She seems...hesitant about these murders. Look at the smaller cuts near the mortal wound. If I'm not mistaken those are hesitation wounds. Almost like she doesn't want to kill them, but she feels she has to. I'd say that on the outside she would appear quite ordinary, shy and meek. She has a strong belief system though, and she wouldn't lie about her beliefs. She's willing to kill for it, she wouldn't hide who she is."

"A witch and proud of it," John said. "Shouldn't be too hard to find."

Xander laughed out loud. "I hate to break it to you John, but she just described half the population of Sunnydale. It ain't exactly Mayberry."

"Once we discover what that symbol means, it might add something to the profile," Rachel added.

"I'm on it," Xander said.

"Good," Bailey said. "Meanwhile, Grace I want you to keep studying those autopsy reports until we get there and you can conduct your own. George, I want you to keep searching for a way to link these victims. Mutual places of business, friends, family..."

"Don't forget cults, covens and cadres," Xander added.

"Right," Bailey said. "If the killer has an occult connection then the victims may too."

"Got it," George answered.

"All right people, the plane leaves in an hour. Let's get cracking."

8888888

Xander sat on the VCTF's plane as they flew from Atlanta to California. He was using his laptop to search the Internet for references to the Wiccan circle that had been found at each of the crime scenes. He had already searched through the books he kept in his office before they left, and when he didn't find anything he was even tempted to go back to his apartment to look through his library there, but there just wasn't enough time. He had thought the symbol would be easier to find, but he didn't see it anywhere. He supposed it was possible that the murderer had created it herself for some reason, or perhaps the symbol was just an obscure one. In any event, he hoped that he could find someone in Sunnydale to help him with it. But that brought up another thought. He knew there was no way that the VCTF was going to be able to conduct an investigation without running into Buffy and the gang in an official capacity as it were. Chances were good that she was also investigating the murders herself, even though from what Xander already knew, the killer appeared to be human. How was he going to solve this case and sort out his personal problems all at once? He sighed to himself as he let his head fall into his hands. It was then that he heard the voice of John Grant.

"Hey Xander," he said, taking a seat next to him.

"John," Xander said politely. He liked John well enough, but every once in a while, especially during cases like this, John would give him a hard time about his belief in the occult. Xander couldn't help but feel that if John had seen half the things that he had in his life, it might just be enough to wipe that smug expression off his face.

"Listen, Xander, I'm the one that has to coordinate things with the local PD as usual. This is your hometown, what can you tell me about them. Other than that they're inept," he added as an afterthought.

"Well, they're in a perpetual state of denial basically, as are most people in Sunnydale. It's like a mental defense mechanism, it keeps them from having to deal with things that they're not ready for. Oh, I'm sure they go into the job just like any other cop, with aspirations of justice, duty and honor. But somewhere along the way they just become so broken down by all the weird shit that happens in that town that they just don't care anymore. You shouldn't have any problems with them."

"You keep mentioning that, that it's a weird town I mean. What do you mean, what's so weird about it?"

Xander was still looking down at his computer, only really half paying attention to John. "Witches, werewolves, vampires, demons, cults, end of the world prophecies, vortexes that will suck you into the bowels of Hell. That sort of thing," he answered casually.

John laughed hesitantly at what he perceived to be an odd joke. Everyone always laughed, Xander thought. Many people had akin him to Fox Mulder on the X-Files, especially when he was still at the Academy. They had even given him a nickname, just like 'Spooky' Mulder. They called him 'The total fucking mental case.' Granted, it didn't have quite the same ring to it, but it came from the heart nonetheless. Xander just shrugged it off. He was made of sterner stuff, he didn't let things like that bother him anymore. "You make it sound like a little piece of Hell on Earth," John said with a chuckle.

Xander looked up from his computer and met John's eyes with his own. "Now you're getting the idea," he said, completely serious. He had more things to worry about than feeding John's own denial. In a little while, he would more than likely see things that he would be unable to deny.

"Seriously though," John pushed just as Xander turned back to his screen.

Xander sighed audibly. "John, let me ask you something. What do you believe in?"

John paused for a moment before answering. "Well, I was raised Catholic if that's what you mean, though I haven't been to Church in years."

"Do you still believe in God?"

"Yeah, I suppose I do."

"Do you believe in the Devil then?"

"No," John answered quickly with a nervous little chuckle. Xander could tell that John's nervousness was coming from his own seeming seriousness.

"So, you believe that there is an all-powerful benevolent being, but not an all-powerful malevolent being." He paused to give John a chance to say something, he didn't, so Xander continued. "Let me tell you what I believe John. I believe that there is a...universal energy force if you will. Call it what you like, chi, karma, vibes, whatever. It's this force that keeps everything in balance. You see, it's all about balance. Yin and yang, light and dark, good and evil, one can't exist without the other. Throughout the world, there exist elements of good, and elements of evil, but in the end they all balance out. Now, think of Sunnydale as a microcosm of the universe, a simplification of all that balance. Where good is clearly good and evil is clearly evil, and there are very few shades of gray. It's pure, and whenever to boil something down to it's purest form, you also get it in it's most potent form. Are you following me here, John?"

John looked very confused but he nodded anyway. Xander resisted the urge to laugh.

"Okay, let me put it to you this way. Sunnydale is a town, in which where there exists nothing short of pure evil. You say you believe in God. Well I hope that your faith is strong, because there may come a time when it will be all you have left."

John just stared blankly at Xander for a few seconds. Then he let out a breath and shook his head. "You are one weird guy Xander," he said.

Xander turned back to his computer. "So they tell me," he mumbled. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to do."

John raised his hands in a mock surrender gesture before standing and going back to his original seat. Xander just shook his head to himself as he kept searching the web for the answer to his supernatural question. He felt someone sit down next to him in the seat that John had just occupied, and could tell from the smell of her perfume who it was without even looking up. "Rachel," he said in greeting.

"Xander," she returned, mocking the same tone he used. "I overheard your conversation with John. I think you scared the crap out of him."

"Good, he should be scared. It'll keep him on his toes," Xander said without looking up.

"Xander, I know what you're doing. You forget, I've known you too long. I'm not going to be as easy to get rid of as he was."

"I didn't say all that to get rid of him," Xander said looking up. He paused. "Okay, maybe I did. I'm just a little...on edge."

"I don't blame you," Rachel said. "I would be too if I were going back to the people I loved to show them the person I had become. To try to explain it to them why I left and haven't been back."

Xander smiled slightly. Rachel was the only one that really knew anything about how Xander had left Sunnydale, and how he felt about the people he had left behind. With the exclusion of Buffy and Willow, Rachel was Xander's oldest friend. "You told Bailey, didn't you?"

"I might have mentioned it."

"I thought it was kind of odd that he remembered the name of my hometown."

"You're not mad at me, are you?"

"No, of course not. I'm glad he gave me a heads up. It prevented me from spitting my coffee all over the conference table when he said Sunnydale," he said, trying to sound jovial.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Rachel asked gently after a few seconds.

"It's just...I don't know what to say to them. How am I going to explain to them why I left when I'm not even sure myself?"

"Why did you leave?"

Xander paused. "I was angry. Angry about the way they treated me, angry that they were growing up and leaving me behind, angry with myself because I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to stay, I really did. I just didn't know how to. I couldn't keep being the person I was, and I couldn't grow up as long as I was still there."

"So, do you think leaving was a mistake?"

"No," Xander answered. He paused for a moment, in thought. "Maybe leaving wasn't a mistake, maybe it was just the way I left that was a mistake. I mean, they were the people I cared about. The people I loved. I at least owed them a goodbye. And my timing could have been a little better too."

"You did love them, didn't you? And you still do." Xander just nodded. "Xander, they're your friends. They'll understand."

"But what if they don't?"

"Then you'll make them understand. You'll tell them how you feel about them, how you really feel about them, then you'll apologize for the mistakes you've made, and you'll beg for their forgiveness."

"And what if they don't forgive me? What if they don't feel the same way?"

Rachel reached out and put her hand on top of his and squeezed it. "Then it's their loss," she said tenderly.

Xander smiled. "Thanks Rachel," he said squeezing it back. "You're a good friend."

8888888

After the plane landed and the group made their way to Sunnydale, they spent most of the day being briefed by the Sunnydale PD. They visited the crime scenes so Rachel could get a feel for the murders, but they found that the evidence hadn't been preserved very well. The symbols had been washed away in the rain, so all they had now were the pictures taken when the bodies were originally found. They found out that two of the victims weren't even from Sunnydale, and that when questioned, their friends and family had no idea what they were doing in the town. George still hadn't made any connection between the women, but he was still working on it. Xander kept up his research as well, stopping in a few local magic shops and picking up a few books to try and find the meaning of the symbol, he was unsuccessful however. He had a feeling though that if he showed the symbol to certain people, they would know what it was immediately. But he wasn't ready for that yet. He had somehow managed to spend the entire day avoiding places where he might run into people that would recognize him, his parents didn't even know he was back in town. Rachel tried to refine her profile a bit more, brainstorming with the group as they often did. They sat gathered in one of the hotel rooms they had rented for the VCTF, doing just that. Rachel pacing back and forth, Bailey sitting in a nearby chair, George on the bed with his laptop in front of him, Grace sitting next to him with the autopsy reports spread out in front of her and John leaning against the wall biting his nails. "I'm still feeling a sense of reluctance," Rachel said as she glanced at the crime scene photos. "The murders are simple, almost ritualistic."

"Like a sacrifice," Bailey said.

"Maybe," Rachel said. "From what I understand about the Wicca religion though, sacrifice isn't part of it."

"Well, maybe that's why she's so reluctant," John said. "It goes against her religion."

"But it has to do with it at the same time," Rachel said. "The killer is very conflicted."

It was then that the door opened and Xander walked in carrying a box of doughnuts. "All right, I got jelly, I got glazed, and of course, coffee."

Rachel smiled at the last part and took the cup that Xander handed her. "Thanks," she said.

"Maybe it is time for a break," Bailey said as he took a cup for himself. "It's getting a little late."

Xander put the box down on the table by the door. He turned to close the door behind him when he paused for a moment, looking out at the parking lot. He then stepped outside the door and moved it to see the number on its front. He reentered the room and closed the door, an odd smile on his face.

"What?" John asked.

"Oh, nothing," Xander said. "I just realized what room this is."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Nothing important."

"It's okay Xander," Bailey said. "We know this is your hometown, you're bound to have some memories. Sit down, have a doughnut, tell us 'what room this is.'"

Xander grabbed a jelly doughnut and sat down next to the table. "It's nothing, really. It's just the room where I lost my virginity."

Rachel sputtered, nearly choking on the coffee in her mouth. Xander and John both laughed at her reaction, Bailey just smiled a little.

"It looks a lot nicer now though, they've cleaned this place up some," Xander remarked.

"You really didn't have to share that," Grace said, trying to suppress a laugh of her own.

"He asked," Xander said in his defense.

"Nothing wrong with fond recollections of one's past," John said with a slick smile of his own.

"Well, I wouldn't go that far," Xander said.

"Why, bad break-up?" John asked.

"Not exactly," Xander replied. "She kind of went psycho and tried to kill me. Then later that year a friend of mine put her in a coma, she's probably dead by now," he said taking a bite of his doughnut, as casual as though he were talking about the weather. "So, where were we?"

The rest of the group looked a little taken aback. Rachel recovered first. "We were just talking about the killer's contradictory nature, how she seems to be killing on behalf of her beliefs, yet at the same time killing is against her beliefs."

"Interesting," Xander commented.

"Have you found the meaning of that symbol yet?" Bailey asked. "Maybe that will clue us in as to her motives."

"Not yet," Xander answered. He paused a moment, seeming reluctant. "But I think I might know some people in town who can help me, I'll go see them tomorrow."

Bailey could tell by Xander's tone that he was worried about seeing these people. "All right, but I want to keep this official, so you'd better take someone else with you."

"Bailey, I really don't think that's necessary. They may be more informative if I'm alone." Xander was worried about exposing his friends to the realities of Sunnydale, even though he knew that sooner or later he wouldn't have a choice.

"Never the less Xander, I want one of us with you," Bailey said.

"I'll go," Rachel spoke up. Xander looked up and met her eyes, he saw the concern mixed with reassurance as she smiled softly at him. Xander considered it a moment before deciding to himself that maybe it was a good idea to have some moral support when he went to face his friends.

He smiled back at her. "Thanks Rachel."

8888888

It was a gorgeous morning, Buffy thought. Not too hot, not too humid, a slight breeze blew through the trees and cooled her skin. It was the perfect weather for a workout. Her and Riley were sparing lightly in the courtyard outside Giles' condo. Giles sat nearby, book in hand as usual. And next to him, sat Amy, gazing at the screen of her laptop. "Riley," Giles spoke up. "Are you sure there is no way you can get your hands on those police reports?"

"I'm telling you Giles, I tried," Riley said as he blocked blows from his girlfriend. "All my contacts in the police department tell me the same thing. The Feds are involved now, it's out of their hands."

"Maybe this is a good thing Giles," Buffy said, still not taking her eyes off Riley. "Let the FBI handle this one, they're bound to be more effective then the Sunnydale PD."

"Granted," Giles agreed. "But these murders have a definite occult undertone, that much we can be certain of. I don't know if even the FBI will be prepared for...well, for whatever this turns out to be. Right now we don't know enough to be sure of anything. All we know is that there have been three murders, we know that the victims we stabbed, and we know that there was some kind of symbol found near each of the bodies. Amy, have you had any luck getting into the police department's database?" Giles asked, turning to Amy.

"No," she said. "I'm afraid I'm not quite as proficient a hacker as Willow. I'll be glad when she's back from this business trip of hers."

"As will we all," Giles said. "But let's not forget, if it wasn't for Willow and Willtech Software, Inc..."

"We know Giles, we know," Buffy interrupted. "We'd all have to go out and get real jobs." She nodded to Riley that she was ready to stop, he nodded back thankfully. He walked over to the table and picked up his water bottle, throwing Buffy hers. She caught it and took a long drink.

"When is Willow getting back anyway?" Riley asked.

"Tara went to pick her up at the airport this morning," Giles answered. "They should be here shortly. I've told Willow as much as we know over the phone last night. She seemed excited to be dealing with a problem of this nature, as opposed to all the quote, 'boring business stuff.'"

Buffy smiled. "That sounds like Willow all right. The only person I know who could be excited at the prospect of a new evil in town."

"I guess some things never change."

Everyone's head turned at the sound of the new voice. What they saw made their jaws hit the ground. Standing at the front gate of the courtyard just a few feet away was someone that they thought they'd never see again. He looked a little older. He was a little better dressed, wearing a suit and a brown trench coat, and he had a small goatee beard. Standing next to him was a woman with auburn hair. She looked back and forth between him and the rest of them as the silence stretched on. Buffy was the first to find her voice.

"Xander?" It was a question, like she wasn't quite sure if she could believe her eyes.

Xander nodded. "Yeah, it's me Buff," he said, matching her soft tone. What happened next had been exactly what Xander had expected. Buffy closed the distance between the two of them, and punched Xander in the face. He went down, hitting the pavement with his hands so as not to hurt himself. He prepared himself for the blow, but he still went down hard. He had forgotten just how strong Buffy was. Rachel was there in an instant, stepping forward towards Buffy. "No!" Xander said, stopping her. Rachel stopped and looked down at him, then she helped him up. As soon as Xander was on his feet again, Buffy wrapped him in a hug. She slid her arms around his midsection and buried her face in his chest. He could feel the tears against his shirt. He put his arms around her and patted her back lightly as he leaned his head on top of hers. "I'm glad to see you too," he whispered.

Buffy finally pulled back after a moment and wiped her face. Riley was right there, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. Giles stood before him now, an almost blank expression on his face. "You're not going to hit me too, are you G-man," Xander said.

Giles actually smiled, which surprised Xander. "Only if you call me G-man again," he said, and then he too hugged him.

When he pulled back, Xander caught a glimpse of the other person that had been seated at the table. "Amy?" he asked.

She smiled. "Hey Xander, good to see you again."

"You too," he said. "The last time I saw you, you were...smaller."

"Yeah, Willow fixed that a few years ago."

"Where is Willow?" Xander asked, hoping that he didn't sound as desperate and pathetic as he thought he did.

"She should be here shortly," Giles said. "What are you doing here Xander? Why did you come back?"

"Well, apart from the obvious reason, to see all of you, I'm here on business." He glanced at Rachel. "Oh, I'm sorry. Everyone, this is Rachel Burke. Rachel, this is Buffy, Giles, Amy, and Riley."

"It's nice to meet all of you, I've heard so much about you," Rachel said.

"So," Amy said. "Are you and Xander..."

"No," they both answered at the same time.

Xander smiled. "Rachel is a colleague of mine I guess you could say."

"Exactly what kind of business are you here on?" Giles asked.

"I'm sorry," Xander said again. "I haven't properly introduced myself either." He reached into his coat and retrieved a small item that looked like a wallet. He flipped it open to reveal his ID. "Special Agent AleXander Harris, FBI. Violent Crimes Task Force." Their collective jaws hit the floor again. "I'm here because of the recent murders, but I'm sure you've figured that out." He paused. "I need your help."

8888888

Xander sat on Giles couch and Rachel sat next to him, holding a bag of ice against his jaw. She removed it and examined the slightly purple area that was forming. "I can't believe she hit you," she said.

"I expected it. Buffy tends to act on impulse," Xander said. "I'm kind of relieved actually."

"Relieved?" Rachel asked. "Why?"

"Well, you see, Buffy ran away for a few months back in high school. The rest of us went nuts looking for her. But when she finally came back, we all just pretended like nothing was wrong. It all came to a head one night, and a lot of hurtful things were said. In the end, I guess you could say our friendship was stronger for it, but it still hurt. We learned not to bottle things up." Xander smiled and winced slightly at the pain it caused in his jaw. "At least I know Buffy isn't holding anything back." He let out a sigh as he held the bag against his face again. "Maybe this was a bad idea," he said. "Maybe I shouldn't have come back."

"No."

They both turned to see Buffy standing behind them.

"Will you excuse us Rachel," Xander said, not taking his eyes from Buffy.

"Of course," she answered. She stood and stepped out the door.

Buffy approached and sat next to Xander. They were both silent for a moment. "I'm sorry I hit you," Buffy said.

Xander shook his head. "Forget it," he said. "I deserved it."

"No, you didn't. I was just angry. You have as much right as the rest of us to live whatever life you want to. You don't owe us anything." She paused. "Except maybe an explanation."

"And an apology," Xander said, turning to face her. He put the ice bag down on the coffee table. "I left because I thought it was time to. I needed to start a life of my own. As much as I wanted to stay, there was nothing keeping me here. I wasn't needed."

"That isn't true," Buffy said. "We needed you."

"You seem to have done pretty well without me." Buffy didn't respond. "I do owe you an apology," Xander said. "I should have at least said goodbye."

"You just disappeared," Buffy said. "We didn't know whether you were alive or dead, until finally your parents told us you took off. Damn it Xander! Five years! You couldn't call? You couldn't write, let us know you were okay?"

"I was afraid."

"Of what!"

"Of this. Of what you would think of me...for bailing on you. I've been a screw-up since the day I was born." He paused. "I didn't want the people I cared about the most to see me as a failure. I was waiting until I had something to be proud of."

"So what happened. You obviously have something to be proud of now. I mean, the FBI. No offense but, wow."

"Believe me, no one was more surprised then me," Xander said with a smile. He paused again. "I guess I was still afraid. I didn't know if I'd be welcome."

"Of course you're welcome Xander," Buffy said with pause. She smiled slightly and looked Xander in the eye. "Tell me."

Xander smiled back a little. "Well, I went to the FBI Academy not to long after I left. I wanted to do something where I could help people again. I joined the Behavioral Sciences Unit, that's where I met Rachel. I stayed in Washington for a few years, until a series of murders in Miami. I knew it was a demon, so I headed down and met up with the VCTF. Well, we stopped the guy, and I ended up assigned to the VCTF permanently. I've been with them a little over a year now. Your turn."

"Well, a little while after you left, the Initiative tried to kill me. So Riley quit and started working with us. We found out that the Initiative was doing experiments, creating a demon/human hybrid. Well, it escaped and we eventually caught it and killed it. They left after that, we think the army pulled their funding. Riley stayed, he helps out the police department now and then, but mostly he helps with the slaying. Willow and I graduated about a year ago with degrees in psychology. I work part time at the rape crisis center, but Willow discovered she had a talent for something else. She started designing software programs for fun, and she ended up selling a few. So that was the birth of Willtech Software, Inc. That's where she is now, in New York meeting with the lawyers. They're putting out a new accounting software package. Amy and Tara both work for her."

"Tara?"

"Oh, that's right. You never met her, did you? She went to college with us, her and Willow became very good friends. She's a witch too. You'd be surprised how powerful the three of them are together."

"A witch's trinity," Xander said. "Yes, three is a very powerful number in Wicca."

"How did you know that?" Buffy asked.

"Just because I work for the FBI now doesn't mean I lost all interest in the occult. I'm kind of like Fox Mulder, only with vampires instead of aliens."

Buffy laughed. "Let me see, what else? Oh, Giles opened a bookstore, but I'm sure you could've guessed that. We all pitch in every once in a while, plus it allows him to research while he's at work. I guess that's it."

Just then the pair were interrupted by the sound of footsteps coming up the hall, and the sound of grumbling. Xander turned to see a very pale blonde man wearing only boxer shorts emerge from the hall and head into the kitchen. "Bloody hell, they know I sleep during the day you think they could keep it down," he mumbled to himself as he took a small container of what Xander guessed to be cow's blood out of the refrigerator and drank it down.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot," Buffy said in a very un-enthused voice. "Hey!" she said turning to Spike. "Use a glass, would you!"

"Bugger off!" Spike responded.

"I guess some things never change," Xander said.

Spike looked up at the sound of his voice. "Oh, it's you," he said, mimicking Buffy's earlier tone.

"Nice to see you too Spike," Xander said.

Spike just growled a little and through the now empty plastic container in the trash before heading back down the hall and back to bed. "He's surprisingly useful now that all the demons in town hate him," Buffy said. "He likes to pretend he still hates us, but I think he's warming up."

Xander laughed, and then paused. He was unsure of his next question. He was afraid of what the answer would be. "How is Willow?"

Buffy paused too. "She's good, now. After you left she was heartbroken. First Oz, and then you, she was depressed for a long time. She told me about the conversation that the two of you had the night before you left. She kept playing it over and over in her mind, wondering what she said, what she should have said. It took a long time for her to stop blaming herself, but she had a lot of friends to help her."

"That's why you hit me, isn't it?" Xander asked. "Because of what my leaving did to Willow."

Buffy nodded. "She still thinks about you a lot, she misses you."

"She must hate me," Xander said, sitting back on the couch, bringing his hands to his face.

"It might be easier if she did, but you know Willow. She's not capable of it, especially when it comes to you. I think she realizes now that you had your own reasons for leaving, but I don't think it makes it hurt any less. She always regretted one thing she said that night, something about how friends grow apart. I don't think it was until you were gone that she realized how much you meant to her."

"Believe me, I know what you mean," Xander said.

That's when they both heard voices in the courtyard. One Xander recognized right away, the other he assumed to be that of Tara. Buffy and he both stood, and Xander straightened his suit. He felt like...well, there really weren't words to describe how he felt. Nervous, excited, scared, all at once. Buffy put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and smiled. Xander took a deep breath, and together the two of them stepped out into the courtyard.

"Goddess, am I glad to be home," Willow said. She was dressed in a black business suit with a skirt, and she held a small attach case. She set it down and gave Giles a hug.

Giles smiled. "You were only gone for a few days Willow," Giles said.

"I know, but I hate New York. And I hate lawyers too, I wish I could put out a product without having to worry so much about legal repricussuions. I'm so glad to be back, I think I might hug Spike." They all laughed a little at that. That was when Willow saw someone she didn't know. "Hello," she said.

"Hi," Rachel said shaking her hand. "I'm Agent Rachel Burke, I've heard a lot about you. I'm a friend of..."

"She's here investigating the murders," Giles interrupted.

"I see," Willow said. "And just what brings you to us?"

"Well..." Rachel trailed off. Willow followed her eyes and turned to look towards the door of the condo. She saw Buffy standing there and a man in a suit.

"Oh, hey Buff...y," Willow's thoughts dropped off when she made eye contact with the man. "Xander?" she said, the tears already starting to come. Xander stepped forward and Willow ran into his arms.

Xander held her tightly, and he could feel a tear of his own starting to slide down his cheek. This was the woman he loved. This was his best friend in the whole world. This was the moment he had been thinking about for the last five years. Even before logical thoughts entered either of their brains, they began to speak.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry..."

"No, it's my fault..."

"I've missed you so much..."

"I shouldn't have left..."

"Why didn't you call us? Where have you been..."

They babbled on and on for two full minutes, still holding on to each other. Buffy found her way to Rachel, and they were both smiling as they looked on at their friends. "So that's where he got that habit from," Rachel said referring to the string of babble coming out of both of them.

Buffy laughed. "Yup," she said. "They've known each other so long, they don't even have to finish their sentences."

"What are you doing here?" Willow asked Xander as they came apart.

"We're here investigating the murders," Xander said.

Willow turned and looked at Rachel when Xander said 'we.' "You mean, you..."

Xander pulled out his badge and pushed back his jacket to show her the glock on his hip. "Special Agent Xander Harris," he said with a smile of pride.

"Oh, Xander. That's great, I knew you could do it," Willow said.

"Well, that makes one of us," Xander said. "So, will you help us Will?"

"On one condition," Willow said. "You don't leave without saying goodbye this time."

Her tone was soft, and Xander could see the pain in her eyes. He pulled her into another hug, resting his chin on top of her head. "It's a deal Wills," he said. "It's a deal."

8888888

The group sat gathered around Giles coffee table. Xander pulled out a file folder containing the police report and began thumbing through it. He pulled out a photograph of the symbol from on of the crime scenes and placed it on the table. "Do you know what this symbol is?" he asked them.

Willow glanced at it for half a second before she responded. "It's an Aurora circle," she said.

Xander smiled a little and turned to Rachel. "You see. I've been researching for nearly two straight days now, she takes one look and knows what it is immediately."

Willow smiled at the compliment before explaining. "Well, there's a reason for that," she said.

"I sense a story coming," Xander said.

Willow glanced at Amy, and she spoke up. "It's named for Aurora Madison. She was burned at the stake in 1782 during the Sunnydale Witch Trials," Amy said.

"Madison? Any relation Aims?" Xander asked.

"Yes actually, she's an ancestor of mine. It's one of the reasons my mother moved us here in the first place. She thought it would increase her power to be closer to the spirit of a powerful ancestor."

"I've never heard of the Sunnydale Witch Trials," Xander said.

"Well, it's a bit of a misnomer really," Amy continued. "Aurora was the only witch burned. It was shortly thereafter that the railroad came and everyone seemed to forget about such things."

"There is one major difference from the Salem Witch Trials," Willow piped up. "That being that the women burned in Salem weren't witches, Aurora was."

"It seems that someone saw Aurora and the rest of her coven in the woods one night, performing a ritual of some sort. Aurora was the only one identified, so she was the only one killed. This circle was created for a protection spell that Aurora constructed to protect the rest of her coven. It protected them from harm, and in the event of death, it ensured their spirit safe passage to the next realm. It also protects the body from any demon infestation."

"You mean..." Xander trailed off.

"Yes," Willow said. "We've used it once or twice. Draw it on top of a grave of a..." Willow stopped as she glanced at Rachel who seemed confused. "That is..."

Xander, seeing her reluctance, spoke up. "Just say what you need to say Wills, I'll figure out a way to explain it later."

"The symbol will prevent a vampire from rising."

"Well, that does seem to correspond to what we have so far. The killer is reluctant to commit these acts, going so far as to cast a protection spell to prevent them from being turned, and yet she continues to kill."

"She?" Buffy asked.

"Yes," Xander said. "The forensic evidence and the profile points to a woman."

"Are we sure it's a human?" Tara asked.

"The first victim put up quite a struggle. If it was a vampire or any other kind of demon, I don't think they would have had so much trouble. Also, the symbol would indicate an involvement in Wicca."

"Now that I have a hard time believing," Willow said. "Wicca is about embracing nature, individualism, magic. It's about accepting that we all have an impact on the world in our daily lives, and it's about taking responsibility for that. It's not about violence or murder."

"Granted," Xander agreed. "But this would hardly be the first time someone has utilized it for evil purposes."

"That's certainly true," Amy said. "I haven't finished the story. You see, after Aurora was burned, the puritan leaders of the town sought out the five remaining members of the coven. More specifically, they enlisted the help of a warlock, a particularly devious one at that. Without knowing the identities of the women, he placed a curse on them and all their descendants. Bad fortune would surround them and all they love. And the only way to break the curse was to reunite all five of them again in Sunnydale, and kill them."

"Hell of a choice," Xander said. "Be cursed or be killed."

"As I'm sure you can imagine, they chose the former. They left Sunnydale, and disappeared." Amy let out a deep sigh and clenched her fists in frustration. "I mean, can you believe it! They used dangerous black magic to punish innocent practitioners of white magic, whose only crime was practicing their own religion. How asinine is that!"

"All right Amy, it's okay, just relax," Tara said laying her hand on Amy's arm. "She tends to get a little wound up about this," she said.

"I don't blame you Aims, people in this country never were very open minded when it came to other religions," Xander said. "The worst part is that things haven't changed very much. What about the weapon? According to the autopsy report, it was a triangular blade about six inches long. Does that mean anything to anyone?"

"Nothing I can think of," Willow said. The others shook their heads as well.

"These murders may be reluctant but they're also important," Rachel said, still a little unsure about the direction the conversation had turned it, but confident enough in her own abilities to speak up. "The knife would probably be a family heirloom, something with some personal significance. The symbol would also indicate a feeling of remorse."

"That makes sense," Xander said. "She's committing these murders because she feels she has to. We just have to figure out why."

"Why would a Wiccan commit a series of murders?" Buffy mused out loud. "Well, I guess we can assume that because she feels bad about these crimes, that whatever the reason she believes it to be a good one. Maybe she's trying to stop something even worse from happening."

"Like a prophecy?" Tara said.

"Maybe," Xander said thoughtfully. "Giles, could you see what you can dig up about any ancient prophecies that might be coming our way. Willow, Amy, Tara, could you do me a favor and try to think of anyone you might know who's been acting strange lately. Someone with good intentions, but who doesn't always end up doing the right thing." Giles and the girls nodded.

"Riley, Spike and I will step up the patrols too," Buffy said. "It might help now that we know what we're looking for."

"Good," Xander said. "And we'll use this information to refine the profile a little bit and keep trying to track down this woman through more conventional means. Come on Rach, we'd better head back before Bailey wonders what the hell happened to us." Xander and Rachel both stood to leave.

"You're leaving already?" Willow asked, nearly panicking.

"Just for a little while Wills," Xander said. "We've all got some things to take care of. I'll tell you what, I'll come back later and we can all have dinner together."

"Okay," Willow said with a smile.

"Xander, if you return after nightfall, be sure you take... precautions," Giles said.

Xander smiled. "I haven't been gone that long G-man, I'm prepared," he said patting his hip.

"Yes, but a gun won't do you very much good against the undead," Giles said.

"You might be surprised," Xander said. He pulled the glock from his holster and dropped the clip into his hand. "I had a friend of mine at the FBI gun lab make these up for me. They're hollow points filled with holy water." He smiled and slammed the clip back into the gun. He pulled back the slide to make sure there was a round in the chamber, then re-holstered it. "That ought to sting them a little."

Giles smiled slightly. "Just be careful Xander," he said.

"Ah, G-man. I didn't know you cared," he said flashing a typical Xander grin. He gave Buffy a hug goodbye, and Willow and extra-long hug goodbye and he and Rachel headed out the door.

They were barely out of the courtyard on the way back to the car when Rachel stopped him. "All right, time to explain," she said.

"Oh, right," Xander said as though it at just occurred to him. "I almost forgot. Okay, you know all that stuff you've read about vampires and witches and werewolves and demons and magic and all that other stuff that you thought was just make-believe?" he asked in a very casual tone.

"Yeah," Rachel responded.

"Well, it's all real." He flashed another grin and then continued to the car as though that were the only explanation necessary. Rachel stood a moment, confused by his seemingly casual tone, and then ran to catch up to him.

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Xander drove as they headed back to the Police Department to tell Bailey what they found. He told Rachel everything. Well, an abridged version of everything. He told her how when he was a sophomore in high school, he had met Buffy Summers and was introduced to the world as it exists in Sunnydale, CA. He told her that Buffy was the slayer and that Giles was her watcher. He told her that Willow, Tara and Amy were witches. He told her a little bit about the Master, The Anointed One, Spike and Dru, the Mayor, Faith, Oz, and anything else he could think of. Rachel was silent the whole time, trying to absorb everything. Xander could tell that she was torn. On one hand, Xander was her friend and she wanted to believe him, but on the other hand, these were things that her mind would not let her believe. In the end, Xander just offered her a reassuring smile and said, "I know you don't believe me, I wouldn't either if I was in your position. But the time will come when you'll see it for yourself. I just want you to be prepared."

Rachel nodded. "What are we going to tell Bailey and the others?"

"We'll tell them exactly what Willow and Amy told us. Whether they believe in it or not isn't important, all that matters is that the killer believes it." Rachel nodded in agreement but Xander could tell that she was still unsure. "Tell you what, just let me do the talking."

"It's called an Aurora circle, and it's a protection spell," Xander explained to the assembled members of the VCTF as they all stood around in the Sunnydale PD's squad room.

"I don't think it worked," John said.

"It was probably cast after they were already dead," Xander continued. "It also serves as a blessing of sorts for the dead. It ensures their soul safe passage to the next realm, and protects their body from demon infestation."

"So what does this mean?" John asked.

Rachel sighed. "The killings are violent, but calculated. The killer is angry, but not at the victims. She has sympathy for them, and is killing them because she feels she has to for some reason. She's managed to channel the negative feelings she's having into the killings, but that isn't where they originate. But whatever the reason she's angry, she feels that these murders are the solution."

"Do you have any theories as to what she could be so angry about?" Bailey asked. "What would force someone to commit murders that they don't want to?"

"Well, even though violence and murder go against nearly every edict of the Wicca religion, I think these killings have something to do with it," Xander said. "Perhaps she feels she has to do this to right some great wrong, or to prevent one. I'm researching any mystical prophecies that might call for a human sacrifice."

"This also suggests that the victims chosen would have some significance. They don't appear to have any physical similarities, George, have you found anything that would link these women?" Rachel asked.

"Nothing so far," George answered. "One was from Sunnydale, one from Los Angeles, one from San Diego. No one knows why the latter two were in Sunnydale. They were staying at separate motels, and nothing in their personal effects clued us as to why they were here. I'm still checking phone records and cross-referencing their names in every database I can think of. There is one thing though. Xander asked me to check if the victims had any connections to the occult. The first victim had an extensive collection of occult books and crystals in her apartment, and the second victim was a student at UCLA. Her friends there mentioned that she had an interest in witchcraft and things like that. Still nothing on the third victim though."

"Well, it can't be a coincidence," Xander said.

"Agreed," Bailey said. "Xander, I want you to continue your research. Something tells me that we won't catch this woman until we can understand her better. You and Rachel should work together on the profile." Rachel and Xander both nodded. "The rest of us will just have to rely on old fashioned police work. Canvassing the area, poring over witness reports, continue to try to link the victims. All right people, let's get to work."

The team went about their separate tasks. Xander pulled Rachel aside. "Rachel, I think you and I both know that this killer isn't going to be caught by good old fashioned police work. The only chance we have lies with us and my friends. Now, this might not be exactly procedure, so I want to know if I can count on you to trust me."

Rachel paused for a moment, searching Xander's eyes. "I trust you Xander, you haven't given me any reason not to. I just hope your friends know what they're doing."

Xander smiled. "Believe me, they know what they're doing."

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Xander knocked on Giles' door shortly after sunset, dressed in the same suit he wore when he saw them earlier that day and carrying a bottle of wine under his arm. His mother had always told him, if you're ever invited to dinner, bring something. Of course, she told him about being a polite dinner guest so that he would get invited more so that she would have to feed him less, but the sentiment still rang true. Xander laughed to himself a little as that thought drifted across his head, just as the door opened to reveal a smiling Buffy. "Hey," she said.

"Hey," he said back, returning the smile. He handed her the bottle and removed his coat.

"What's this?" Buffy asked.

"A peace offering," Xander said. Buffy smiled and walked into the kitchen to chill the bottle. Xander looked around. The place hadn't changed much in the last five years, except the books seemed to be a bit more organized, and their seemed to be more of them. Xander browsed through the titles a little.

"You really didn't have to bring anything," Buffy said, reentering the room. "Willow kind of went all out for this dinner, she thought of everything."

Xander turned. "Where is Willow anyway?"

"Probably still upstairs. Last I saw she was having a conniption because she couldn't get her make-up right. Amy was helping her."

Xander glanced at the table, which was already set, and through the hole in the wall between the kitchen and the living room, where he could see the meal in various stages of preparation. He saw Giles standing over the stove, and Tara was standing at the counter chopping vegetables. "I hope you all didn't go to too much trouble," he said.

"Nah," Buffy answered. "We all have dinner like this at least once a week. Just one big, happy, extended family. Except for Spike, he bolted as soon as the sun went down."

Xander smiled weakly as he sat down across from Buffy.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Nothing. It's just, I'm getting a glimpse of what I've missed out on because of my stupidity. I mean, you guys really were the only family I ever had, and I just left. I feel like the world's biggest jerk."

"We all make mistakes Xander," Buffy said. "And regardless of whether or not you've been here for the last five years, you're here now. And we couldn't be happier to have you."

"How's Willow taking this? Seeing me again I mean."

"Are you kidding, she's euphoric!" Buffy said with a smile. "She's smiling so much I think she's going to strain her jaw."

"And?" Xander prompted.

Buffy sighed. "She's hurt Xander, but she learned a long time ago how to put that pain aside. I don't know whether or not it will come back. I guess that's really up to you."

Xander just nodded, not really knowing what to say. He glanced up as he saw a figure come down the stairs, it was Amy. She smiled and said hello before heading into the kitchen. From his seat he could still see through the break in the wall into the kitchen. Tara was still chopping something at the counter. Amy walked up behind her and reached up to open the cabinet above her head. Tara moved her head out of the way, and leaned back closer to Amy. This got Xander's attention, so he continued to watch. Amy took a couple of glasses out of the cabinet and put them on the counter. She came down off her tiptoes just as Tara turned to look at her over her shoulder. She smiled, and Amy wrapped her arms around her waist from behind. Amy smiled back as Tara leaned back into her again. Then their faces came together, and they shared a very heated kiss. Xander was only vaguely aware of a flustered Giles exiting the kitchen, mumbling something about public displays of affection. His eyes still hadn't left the cuddling couple as the kiss broke and Amy began to nuzzle her neck. "Mmm, you smell good," she cooed. Tara just giggled as she returned the embrace.

"Um, Buffy," Xander said when he finally found his voice again. "Remember earlier when you were telling me what I missed these last five years?"

"Yeah," Buffy said.

"I think you forgot something."

Buffy followed his gaze into the kitchen and to the two lovebirds. She smiled. "Did I forget to mention that," she said, trying to hold in a laugh at Xander's reaction.

Xander finally tore his eyes away from them and looked at Buffy. He saw her mischievous smile and couldn't help but smile back. He stood from his chair and sat down next to Buffy on the couch. Leaning closer to her he whispered. "All right, spill."

"Well," Buffy started, suddenly looking uncomfortable. "I guess it really started with Willow and Tara. When Tara first met Willow at their Wicca group, she developed a little crush on her. The more time they spent together, the closer they became. Tara finally told Willow how she felt one night. And Willow, well..."

"What?"

"Willow told her that as much as she cared for her, her heart did and always would belong to someone else."

"Oz," Xander said, crestfallen.

"No, you idiot!" Buffy said smacking him on the leg. "You! When Oz left, Willow was upset, but when you left she was destroyed. She told me that she took for granted that you'd always be here, and when you just disappeared, she realized how important you were to her. She told me that she felt like a piece of her had left too." The color slowly drained out of Xander's face. "It happened to you too, didn't it?" Buffy asked.

He nodded. "That's exactly what it felt like," he said. "I felt like I wasn't whole. The longer I spent away from her the more it hurt, and the more afraid I got. Oh god, how will she ever forgive me?"

Buffy put a reassuring hand on his leg. "She's Willow. That's what she does."

Xander nodded, and silently prayed to himself that she was right. "So what happened with Tara and Amy?"

"Well, Willow and Tara were still friends, but the tension was there. They figured out the counter spell to bring Amy back, and they did it. Amy was a little disoriented for a few days, but she was otherwise fine. Tara helped to take care of her, and pretty soon Amy was back to her old self. The three of them started practicing magic together, and Amy began to sense the tension between Willow and Tara. She asked Willow about it, but she just shrugged it off. Then, one night when Amy and Tara were alone, Amy asked her. Tara broke down and told her everything. They started to grow closer, leaning on each other during tough times, and it just sort of happened."

"How did Willow react?" Xander asked.

"She was and is genuinely happy for them. All she ever wanted was for Tara to be happy. That's all Willow ever wanted for anyone. I just think she thinks that her own happiness has to be the cost. She's given up so much for all of us. She practically supports us with her software company. I just wish she would get something back for it, you know. She really deserves to be happy."

"Oh god, I'm sorry Buffy. I'm sorry," Xander said.

"I know Xander, but I'm not the one you have to tell."

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Dinner had been wonderful. They talked about old times. They laughed and joked, and for the first time in a long time Xander felt like himself again. He felt like he was home again. After dinner, they patrolled as had become the custom in Xander's absence. Xander had volunteered to join them, and now he walked through the park side by side with Willow. Buffy and Riley had paired off, leaving them in a not so subtle move on Buffy's part for them to talk. Willow fidgeted with the stake in her hand as she walked, Xander just kept his hands in his pockets. He honestly never thought he'd be this shy around his best friend, but for several moments he couldn't think of anything to say.

"So..." he started. Willow looked up. "Things sure have changed around here," he said. He mentally kicked himself. 'Smooth Harris, real smooth.'

"Yeah, I guess so," Willow said. "But in a way, they're still the same."

They lapsed into silence again until Xander spotted the swing set in the distance. He smiled and picked up his pace as they walked toward it. He laid his hand on the cold metal, and he smiled again. It was just a simple metal swing set with two swings. The chains were rusted, the paint was peeling off of it, but to Xander it looked like home. He rounded the side and sat down on one of the swings. "God, this brings back memories," he said.

Willow took the swing beside him. She had to admit, it did bring back memories. All the nights of slaying that they had spent, sitting on these very swings and waiting for the undead to show up. Of all the heart to hearts that had taken place here, all the long talks she had had with her friends. Of her childhood, swinging back and forth without a care in the world.

"Remember when Jesse and me got in a contest to see who could swing the highest," Xander said.

"I remember that you fell and broke your arm," Willow said.

"That's right," Xander said as he remembered. "And you and Jesse helped me back home. And I remember that you wouldn't stop crying."

"Hey, give me a break, I was six," Willow said with a laugh. Xander laughed too. "Besides, I was worried about you."

"I remember that I didn't want to cry, because I didn't want you to be scared," Xander said. "That's all I kept thinking about, that what I regretted the most was that I made you cry." Xander looked over and saw Willow lower her head. "I'm sorry Willow," he whispered. "I'm so sorry."

Willow wiped the tears from her cheek. "I want to be mad at you," she said. "Goddess, it would be so much easier if I could be mad at you," she cried. "But like everything else bad that ever happened to me, I turned it on myself. I wondered what it was that I said or did that made you leave."

"Nothing Willow, you didn't do anything. It wasn't your fault."

"Don't lie to me Xander. You didn't just up and walk out of our lives with not so much as a goodbye for nothing. What happened? Was your life here really so terrible?"

What an odd question to ask on the Hellmouth, Xander thought. "No Willow, it wasn't terrible." And what an odd answer. "I met the most important people in my life here. The people I love." Xander sighed. "I wish I could tell you that I left so I could make my life my own, but that's just what happened afterwards. I left because I didn't feel needed anymore. More than anything, that's all I wanted, to feel needed. When we were kids, and Cordelia would make fun of you and I would stand up to her, I felt needed. And every time you smiled at me or laughed at one of my stupid jokes, I felt needed. Even with Buffy and the whole slaying thing, I still felt like I had a part in it. Maybe that's why it hurt so much when it was all taken away. I hadn't changed, but everything around me had, and I felt... obsolete. But Willow, please believe me, it's no excuse for what I did and I don't pretend that it is." Xander sighed again and looked down. "I've realized something over the past five years, something that I wish I had realized then. It didn't matter whether or not you needed me, I needed you. I was just too scared to come back."

"But you were always needed Xander," Willow said, tears still in her voice. "I always needed you." She paused. "I guess I didn't show it sometimes, but we were best friends."

"And we drifted apart," Xander said. "That's what friends do."

"Oh Xander, please don't. You don't know how many times I've run through that conversation in my mind and wished I could have taken those things back. I'm sorry, Goddess Xander, a thousand times I'm sorry. But how long to I have to pay for that mistake?" Her tears grew to sobs as she let her head fall into her hands.

Xander immediately went to her, pulling her into a hug. "Oh, Willow," he cried as she buried her face in his chest. "You were never meant to pay for anything."

"It's just that..." Willow trailed off as she tried to stop crying. She pulled back a little and looked up at Xander. "I never realized how much you meant to me until you were gone. And then it was too late, and I was afraid I'd never get to tell you how much I..." she trailed off again as the tears returned.

Xander pulled her in tighter. "You didn't have to tell me Willow, I knew. I guess in a way, I always knew." Willow looked up at him again, surprised. Xander reached down and wiped a tear off her cheek with his thumb. "Ever since I can remember, you've been the most important person in my life. I know I've been a bit thick in the past, but what can I say, you always were one step ahead of me." He smiled sadly as he pushed a lock of hair away from her face. "Or maybe I was just always too late. I'm sorry Willow, for everything I've ever put you through. And I'm sorry if this comes at a bad time, but there's something I have to say." The earth seemed to stand still as he paused to take a breath before speaking the next sentence. "I love you." Xander paused again, trying to gage her reaction. "Am I still too late?"

Willow laughed at that. Her face covered in tears, and she laughed. She pulled away from the hug and took Xander's hand, leading him to the metal post of the swing set. "Let me show you something," she said. She reached over and brushed some dirt away from the post, and pointed at something.

Xander leaned down and moved to the side to let the light from the nearby streetlight shine on the post. There, carved into the paint, was a heart. And inside the heart, in the handwriting of a child, it said WR loves AH, 4ever. "I put that there the day after you broke your arm," she said. "You were right, I was scared. That was the first time I thought I might lose you, even though it was just a broken arm." Willow laughed nervously. "I was only six."

Xander looked astonished as he turned to meet her eyes. "You knew even then," he said in a whisper.

Willow closed the distance between then in a few steps, and wrapped her arms around Xander. "You could never be too late Xander," she said looking up at him. "I would have waited forever. I love you."

Xander was speechless, so he did the first thing that came to mind. He kissed her. And the moment there lips touched, he knew that it was right. All the doubts, all the fear, it disappeared. The very world around them faded away, until all they were aware of was each other. It was a perfect moment. It was the perfect kiss.

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Mary Stevens walked down Main Street of the small California town called Sunnydale. It was late at night, and she asked herself again for the hundredth time what the hell she was doing there. One moment, she was in San Francisco where she lived, and the next she was on her way to Sunnydale. A phone call, telling her that something from her past awaited her there. Telling her that the power of her ancestors still called Sunnydale it's home, and that all she had to do was to claim it. Mary had been a wannabe Wicca for as long as she could remember. Her mother would tell her stories, stories that she used to believe were fairy tales, but later in life began to believe as fact. If what the woman on the other end of that phone had said was true, and all she had to do was get in touch with her past to awaken the powers that lay dormant inside of her. It would be a dream come true. And now, she walked the streets, the woman's cryptic instructions still rattling around in her head. Why was she being so secretive? Why had she insisted that Mary not tell anyone where she was going, or why? These were all questions floating around in Mary's head, but her curiosity and desire to be more then what she was overcame her fears.

"Mary. Mary Stevens."

Mary turned as she heard someone call her name. It was an ally off of the main street, where a shadow cast down to cover the person who beckoned her. All she could see was shadow, as the figure moved back into the ally. Mary followed. "Hello!" she called out. "Is that you!"

"You've come to claim your power," the voice said.

Mary still couldn't see her, but she answered anyway. "Yes. Yes I have."

"You know of your bloodline," the voice said. "There can be no mistake, and there is no choice. The conditions must be met, and the curse must end. I'm sorry, I truly am."

"I don't understand, what..."

Mary's words were cut short when she was struck from behind. Everything turned black, leaving one final thought to float across Mary's mind. 'How could I have been so foolish?'

Mary's attacker stood over her unconscious body and slowly withdrew a triangular knife from under her clothes. She knelt beside her and raised the knife over her head. Tears streaked down the woman's face. "Goddess forgive me," she whispered. Then she brought the knife down, and plunged it into Mary's heart.

8888888

Xander drove the rented Ford Taurus through the streets of Sunnydale. Rachel sat beside him in the passenger seat, and Riley Finn sat in the back. "So, Xander," Riley started. "How did things go with you and Willow last night?"

Xander cast a glance in the rearview mirror. Riley just smiled nervously. "Fine," Xander said evenly.

"Fine?" Riley repeated. "Just...fine?"

Xander looked back at him again, and then over to Rachel who was smiling. "Don't look at me," she said. "I want to hear about what happened too."

"We just...talked," Xander said.

"About?" Rachel prompted.

Xander let out a sigh, realizing that he wasn't going to get out of this conversation with anything less then full disclosure.

"Come on Xander," Riley said. "If I don't go back with details, Buffy's going to kick my ass. And we both know she can do it too."

Xander smiled at that. "We just...we got a lot of things out in the open. We explained to each other how we felt, and while I wouldn't say that things are totally fixed, we're on the right track." The car pulled up next to a Sunnydale PD black and white and Xander shut the engine off. "Oh, and we kissed," he said as an afterthought as he was getting out of the car.

Rachel and Riley just looked at each other in surprise for a moment before frantically exiting the car to catch up to him.

"What have we got?" Xander asked as he approached the crime scene, snapping a pair of latex gloves onto his hands.

John Grant stood from where he had been crouched next to the body. "Say hello to victim number four," he said. "Mary Stevens, 26."

"Grace?" Xander asked.

Dr. Grace Alverez looked up from the corpse. "Blunt force trauma to the back of the head, single stab wound through the heart. The wound is consistent with the other victims, I'd say it's the same guy...or girl, or whatever."

"Not to mention that she left her calling card again," John said, pointing to the wall of the building next to them. Drawn on the brick with chalk was an Aurora circle.

"What do we know?" Xander asked.

"The address on her driver's license is in San Francisco," John answered, flipping through his notebook. "The family has been alerted, and once again, they had no idea what she was doing in Sunnydale. They did mention though that their family comes from Sunnydale. Oh, and get this, our vic had a serious interest in Wicca."

"Somehow I'm not surprised," Xander said as he leaned down to examine the body. "These victims aren't random, it doesn't fit the profile. She's killing for a reason."

"Agreed," Rachel said as she too leaned down.

"Riley, have there been any other unsolved murders of this nature in Sunnydale in the past couple years?" Xander asked.

"Nothing we haven't already accounted for and...eliminated," Riley answered, glancing at John.

"I'm sorry, I don't think we've been introduced," John said.

"Riley Finn, Military attache to the Sunnydale PD," Riley said shaking John's hand.

"Military? What's their interest in this?" John asked.

"Riley is a friend, John," Xander interrupted. "He's here as a favor to me. He's one of the only competent people associated with the Sunnydale PD."

"Gee, thanks Xander," Riley said. "I think."

Just then Xander's cell phone rang. He fished it out of his pocket and flipped it open. "Harris," he answered.

"Xander it's George, I have something for you."

"What's up?"

"Well, when I got the information on victim number four it got me thinking. We thought that none of the victims had reason to be in Sunnydale, except the one who lived here of course. But Mary Stevens' family was from here originally, so I started looking into the family trees of the other victims, and guess what."

"They all come from Sunnydale too," Xander said.

"Yes, but they don't just have familial ties to Sunnydale, they have ancestral ties. It seems that all the victims come from families that have been in this country, specifically Sunnydale, since as far back as I can find. As far back as 1905."

"1905?" Xander said in surprise. That's when something clicked in Xander's brain, and it all started falling together. "Of course," he mumbled.

"Pardon?" George asked.

"George, I need you to go back further. Trace each victim's direct bloodline, from mother to daughter as far back as you can and get me the name of their earliest ancestor that lived here in Sunnydale."

"How far back do you want me to go?" George asked.

"Ahh, 1782," Xander said sheepishly.

"What!" George exclaimed. "I can't go back that far! They barely had paper records back then, let alone anything that would have been transcribed onto a computer."

"Just go as far back as you can George, I need those names," Xander said.

"All right, I'm on it," George said. "But what's this all about Xander?"

"Right now it's just a hunch, but I think I might have just found what links our victims. Get back to me as soon as you can George."

"All right, bye."

"Later," Xander said as he turned off the phone and put it back in his pocket. He was so lost in thought that for a moment he didn't even see Rachel and Riley standing in front of him.

"What's up?" Rachel asked.

"Like I said, it's just a hunch. I need to talk to Giles and Amy, come on," he said as he started back to the car.

"Xander!" John called out. "You'd better report to Bailey, he's going to be wondering what the hell happened to you."

"I'll talk to him as soon as I think of something...I mean as soon as I have something to report," Xander said with a sheepish grin, leaving a very confused John Grant as the three of them drove away.

8888888

Xander, Rachel and Riley arrived at Giles' place to find what Xander used to refer to in his youth as a research party. Giles, Willow, Tara and Amy sat around the room, all with noses buried in books. "What, a party and no one invited me?" Xander quipped with a smile.

They all looked up upon hearing his voice, Willow giving him a special smile. Xander returned it, and turned back to the others. "Do you have news, Xander?" Giles asked.

"Well, it looks like we have four victims now. This one this morning definitely fits the profile, but that isn't why I stopped by. I have a hunch about something. Amy, do you think you can find the names of the five members of Aurora's coven who were cursed?"

Amy looked up from her book again. "Um...I guess so," she said, turning back to look at the bookshelves behind her. "It might take some time though."

"Well, try to hurry. If I'm right, our killer's only got one more victim to go before she's finished."

"Xander, what are you talking about? Please, tell us what you know," Giles asked.

"Well, we've been operating on the assumption that our killer is trying to stop something from happening, like a prophecy. But what if she's trying to stop something that already happened, like a curse," Xander explained.

"A curse? You mean the curse on Aurora's coven?" Willow asked.

"Exactly. Amy said that it affects their descendants too, maybe someone's finally trying to put an end to it," Xander said.

"By killing the descendants of the original five people who were cursed," Tara said, understanding what Xander was saying.

"The original way to break the curse was to bring the five girls back to Sunnydale and kill them, but since the curse was passed through the generations, killing their descendents should break the curse too," Xander said.

"Here it is." Everyone looked up to see Amy pulling a large book off the shelves. "It's a bound copy of the Sunnydale Tribune from 1780 to 1785," she said handing the book to Xander. "Be careful with it, the pages are very old."

Xander nodded as he took the book. He retrieved a pair of reading glasses from his inside pocket and carefully began paging through the newspapers. "Amy, tell me more about this curse. What exactly does it do, and how exactly does it pass through the generations?" he asked.

"Typical bad fortune curse, with a little extra emphasis on the bad," Amy answered. "It passes through the female bloodline, mother to daughter."

"I suspected as much," Xander mumbled.

"The curse focuses on the youngest female of the bloodline though. As I said, the spell was poorly worded, so there isn't too much finesse to it. All of the curse's power tends to settle to the lowest point in the bloodline, like rain flooding a valley."

"So the entire curse is focused on one girl?" Rachel asked, peeking over Xander's shoulder. "How horrific."

"What about you Amy?" Xander asked. "Being Aurora's descendant, are you affected?"

"No," Amy answered. "The spell was only cast on the girls that escaped capture. Aurora was already dead by then, so there was no point in cursing her."

"Could you get me the exact wording of the spell?" Xander asked.

"Sure," Amy answered, heading back over to the bookshelf.

"Ah, here it is," Xander said as he found the part he wanted. "September 9, 1782. Aurora Madison burned at the stake as a heretic...practicing witchcraft...five other girls present...identities undiscovered," Xander read aloud as he skimmed. "It doesn't have their names here, they were never discovered," he said.

"Check the Missing Persons section for the same day," Amy said, still looking through the books on the shelf.

Xander flipped the page and started reading again. "Missing Persons... Patricia Stevens...Jane Adams...Margaret Jackson...Colleen O'Brien...and a Native American girl who went by the name Raindancer."

"It says 'Native American'?" Willow asked.

Xander smiled. "I'd rather not read what it actually says, makes me ashamed to be a human."

"The first four you said are either the same last name, or similar, to our four victims," Rachel said, looking at her note pad.

"So that just leaves Raindancer," Tara said. "So, her descendant must be the next victim."

"Actually, I don't think so," Xander said. "You see, the only thing missing here is motive. I mean, for someone to want this curse to end so badly that they're willing to kill, they'd have to be affected by it pretty strongly."

"Here's the spell, Xander," Amy said, coming back from the bookshelf with another old text. She opened it to the correct page and handed it to Xander.

"Thanks Aims," Xander said as he started perusing the page. Everyone in the room's eyes were on him as he read silently and nodded to himself. "That's what I thought," he said grimly.

"What?" Willow asked.

"Here, where the spell is cast, it says 'the five heretics that escaped capture and all their decedents'," Xander said, pointing at the book. "But here, where it tells how to break the curse, it just says 'five members of the satanic group', meaning the coven. You were right Amy, it is poorly worded. Or at least, inconsistently worded," he said removing his glasses.

"I don't understand," Riley said. "What does this mean?"

"It means that if we look for that knife that the killer uses, we'll more then likely find that it's Chumash in design. And it means that Raindancer's desendent isn't the next victim," Xander said. "She's the killer."

"Then who's the next target?" Riley asked.

Xander looked up and locked eyes with Amy. She was trembling. Her face was suddenly very pale and she looked like she was about to vomit. When she spoke, it was in a quiet, scared voice. "Me."

8888888

Hours later as the sun was beginning to set, the gang still sat around Giles' living room. Amy was dozing in Tara's arms on Giles' couch. Even with all the danger she had faced before as a Slayerette, Amy was still rather upset by the revelation that she was the next target of the killer they were after. Tara comforted her and tried to get her to relax, but it was clear that she was scared too. Rachel had gone back to report to Bailey, even though there still wasn't very much to report beyond speculation. And George had called with the names Xander has asked for, confirming what they now already knew. Giles sat with a book, Buffy and Riley were getting ready for patrol, and Willow was seating in front of her laptop. Xander walked up behind her a laid a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him and smiled. "Found anything yet?" he asked her.

"Actually, yes," Willow answered. She motioned for Xander to pull up a chair next to her. He did and she continued. "Well, first I tried to start with Raindancer and work up. The only tribe close to Sunnydale at the time was the Chumash, as you know. Unfortunately, there were never any real records kept on them, names and the like. So then I looked through all the Reservations in California from the early 1800s, but no Raindancer. Then I ran the name through a couple of Native American search engines that I found. I got a few hits, but nothing on our girl. Then I..."

"Willow, I hate to interrupt you," Xander broke in. "But you did say that you actually found something."

"I was getting to that," she said with a smile. "I just wanted to remind you how good I am."

Xander slipped his hand overtop of hers where it rested on the armrest of her chair. "No need," he whispered.

She smiled again. "Anyway, it finally occurred to me that I should work backwards. Now, I think we can assume from the knife that our killer holds her heritage important, and we can assume from the way she seems to know Sunnydale that she's from here or lives here still, so I did a search through the National Census records keying on people who put Sunnydale as their town, and Native American as their ethnic group. I'm still waiting for the results."

"Good thinking Wills," Xander said.

"I just hope it works," she said. "We have to find her before she goes after Amy," Willow said, lowering her voice so she wouldn't be overheard.

"Don't worry Willow, I'm not going to let anything happen to her or any of you," Xander said.

Willow looked up at her long time friend, looking him over as though seeing him for the first time again. "You deal with cases like this a lot, don't you? People who aren't really evil, just sick."

Xander nodded. "I never thought I'd say this, but in a lot of ways, fighting vampires and demons is easier. With them you know where you stand, where they stand. They're evil, you kill them, simple as that. But with people, it's rarely ever that simple. I guess that's why I hooked up with the Behavioral Sciences Unit. I wanted to know what made humans tick."

"You've been through so much these last few years. I'm a little jealous. I mean, after all, we've just been up to the same old thing, killing vampires and what not."

Xander smiled at that. "Never did I think that killing vampires would ever fall under the category of 'the same old thing.' Seriously though, Willow, I'm the one who's jealous. Seeing all of you together, like a family. Knowing that I could have been part of that."

"But you are a part of it Xander," Willow said. "You just...took an extended vacation. Besides, it wasn't like you weren't entitled to your own life."

"But I want my life to be here Willow," Xander said. "With you." He reached over and took her hand in his.

Willow smiled as she squeezed his hand. "Maybe, we can teach each other what we've learned while we've been apart," she said. "You could tell me about behavioral science and I could tell you about software design. That way, it won't be like a mistake. There'll be some good to it."

Xander smiled. Leave it to his Willow to always find the upside. "I love you, Willow," he whispered.

"I love you too, Xander," she answered, wanting nothing more then to kiss him right there and then. But she refrained due to the crowded nature of the room.

Their perfect moment was broken by the voice of Spike. "Come on you two, are we going or what," he said to Buffy and Riley as he descended the stairs, pulling on his duster.

"We were waiting for you," Buffy shot back.

"Well then, let's go," the vampire said. Buffy just shook her head as the three of them headed for the door.

"Wait guys!" Willow called out as her computer started beeping at her. "I think I've got something."

Buffy and Riley walked over to where Willow and Xander were sitting. Spike just sat down on the end of the couch, looking utterly bored. Giles put his book down and gave his attention to Willow, as did Amy who was starting to wake up, and Tara.

"I was doing a search on Native Americans in Sunnydale, and I only got one hit," Willow said.

"You mean there's only one Native American in all of Sunnydale," Buffy said. "That's...kind of sad."

"Yeah, well, if you wankers hadn't bloody well killed them all a hundred years ago, I might be surprised too," Spike said.

"Shut-up, Spike!" Buffy, Giles, and Riley all said in unison.

"Sad as it may be, in our case it also happens to be lucky," Xander said. "What else, Willow?"

"Her name is Judith Raines," Willow said.

"Raines? That can't be a coincidence," Tara said.

"I'll try and see if she has a criminal record," Willow said, her hands flying over the keyboard with lightning speed. After a few moments she sighed. "No record," she said. "I'll check the hospitals next."

"What about an address?" Riley asked.

"No," Xander said. "She's too close now. She's not going to be caught that easily."

"Here," Willow said. "She's listed as next of kin for a Sara Raines, a coma patient."

"Mother?" Giles asked.

"No, younger sister," Willow responded.

"Well, that makes sense," Tara said. "If her younger sister is the one the curse is focused on, and she dies, then the curse would turn to her."

Xander nodded thoughtfully. "What else, Willow?"

"Well, it definitely looks like Sara was the one who was cursed. Her medical file reads like a horror novel. She's been in a coma for eight months, and in the year before that alone, she was in four car accidents, broke seventeen bones, she was mugged six times, assaulted four times, had nineteen household accidents, and was hospitalized a total of twenty-two times."

"Oh my," Giles said.

"Unlucky girl," Spike said from the couch.

"I'll say," Xander agreed. "Okay, it looks like this is our girl. Now we just have to figure out how to catch her."

"Sounds like the FBI's department," Tara said, slightly angrily. "Now that you know who she is, why don't you go catch her?"

"If she is a witch, the authorities are ill-equipped to deal with her," Xander answered calmly. "She could hurt a lot of people, and the chances are they won't be able to take her alive. We can."

"How?" Willow asked.

"Simple, we set a trap," Xander answered.

"With Amy as bait!" Tara said incredulously. "I think I hate this plan."

"Amy won't be in any danger, Tara," Xander said. Then he looked to Amy. "I promise. We'll have you backed up on all sides. Once we safely neutralize her as a threat, then Rachel and I can talk her down. Make her give up without hurting herself or anyone else."

Amy slowly nodded her head. "Okay," she said, forcing strength into her voice. Tara looked upset, but she didn't say anything.

"Okay, if I'm right, she'll try and contact you within the next day or so. Once we know when and where she'll be, we can put our plan into effect," Xander said.

"We should be careful," Giles said. "As you said, she is a witch. She may have powers that we are unaware of."

"Yeah, well we have something that she doesn't have," Xander said.

"A slayer," Buffy spoke up.

"Uh, actually I was going to say a witch's trinity," Xander said.

"Yes, or course," Giles said, heading for the bookshelf. "We could do a binding spell of some sort, prevent her from using her powers."

"We're going to need something non-magical too," Xander said. "Something non-lethal. Riley, do you still have your old pulse rifle?"

"Yeah," Riley answered.

"Perfect," Xander said. "This is going to require a little more tactic and a little less brute force then usual."

"Guess that leaves you and me out Luv," Spike said to Buffy with a wink. Buffy just shot him a dirty look.

"Not so fast Spike," Xander said. "I'm going to need you for something else later, so don't go anywhere."

Spike shrugged. "Where am I going to go?" he mumbled.

"Okay," Xander said. "Here's the plan..."

8888888

They didn't have to wait very long. The next day Amy got a mysterious phone call. The woman on the other end spoke of reclaiming lost power. Amy played her part perfectly. She refused to meet the mystery woman in an alley, and told her that if she wanted to meet that she would have to come to her. Xander knew that she would do whatever Amy said, she was too close to back off now. And so the plan went into effect, and the meeting was to take place in the courtyard outside Giles' condo, the next night.

The gang spent the rest of that day making preparations. Xander decided to keep Bailey and the others out of the loop. There wasn't enough time to come up with explanations, and frankly in this situation, they would just get in the way. Once Judith Raines was in custody, then he'd make his report. Telling Bailey that there hadn't been enough time, and hoping that his superior bought it, and that he got to keep his badge when all was said and done. He wasn't really worried though, Bailey trusted him. And maybe even deep down he knew that there was some stuff that he was just better off not knowing. He only wished now that he hadn't had to involve Rachel in all of this, but it really had been unavoidable. It didn't matter now though, everything would be back to normal soon. Or at least what passed for normal around here.

Xander stepped out into the courtyard to get a breath of fresh air. After spending the day cooped up in Giles' apartment, going over every aspect of the plan, he was feeling a little restless. He spotted Buffy, sitting at the table and looking up at the sky. A forlorn expression on her face. "Hey Buff, what's up?" he said, sitting down next to her. "You look like somebody just shot your dog."

"I'm fine," Buffy said unconvincingly.

Xander reached over and took her hand. She turned to face him. "Buffy, I know I haven't been here, and I haven't been a very good friend. But I'm here now," he said squeezing her hand.

Buffy squeezed back. "I don't know. I just feel so...useless."

"You? Useless?" Xander asked in shock. "Slay-gal, the all mighty Buffy. How could you possibly think you're useless?"

"But that's just my point," Buffy said. "Yeah, I'm the slayer, but is that all I'm good for? I can kill demons and vamps but when it comes to dealing with people, I don't know my ass from my elbow."

"Buffy, that's not true at all. What about Jonathan, what about your work at the Rape Crisis Center? You help people all the time. And you shouldn't trivialize what you do as the slayer. You've saved the world, remember. A couple of times."

"It's just not that simple," Buffy said. "I mean, look at your plan. I'm the only one that doesn't have a part in it. Even Spike has something to do, whatever it is."

Xander smiled. The irony was palpable. "Welcome to my world," he said. "Guess what Buff, you're not perfect. Nobody can be the hero 24/7. Not even you. And you know what, that's okay. You don't have to be perfect. If there's one thing I've learned chasing after people instead of demons, it's that nothing is ever cut and dry. There are very few real heroes left in this world, but you're one of them. You can't let one instance overshadow everything you've done. You are the bravest, strongest person I know. And I don't just mean physically. You've been through some stuff that would cause most people to run screaming. But you stayed and fought. I told you once that you were my hero. And you know what, you still are."

Buffy just looked at him for a second before reaching over and pulling him into a hug. Xander just hugged her back. "You really are a good friend, Xander," she said. "You always have been. I wish we had seen that five years ago."

"It's okay, Buff."

"I want you to know something," Buffy said. "I don't blame you for leaving."

Xander smiled. He had been so afraid to come back, afraid of what he would find. But he should have known. They were his friends, the people he loved. As long as he found them, the rest didn't matter. She was forgiving him, and for the first time in a long time, Xander felt worth forgiveness. "Thank you, Buffy," he said hugging her tighter. "Thank you."

8888888

Amy and Tara sat on Giles' couch, several spell books open in front of them. The two of them plus Willow had to perform a binding spell as part of Xander's plan to capture Judith Raines, and it had taken them most of the day to find the appropriate one. It was a complex and powerful spell, one that could only be performed by a witch's trinity, so they were studying it in preparation for the next night's activities.

The pair was alone in the living room now. Most of the others had gone off to patrol, and Giles was in the other room. Tara looked up from her book and across at her girlfriend. "Amy, I'm scared."

Amy looked up. "It'll be okay Tara, we've faced worse things than this and come out on top," she said, reaching out and taking Tara's hand in hers.

"I know, but this is different," Tara said, squeezing Amy's hand. "I don't like you being in danger like this, it isn't fair for them to ask you to do this."

"Tara, I'm a slayerette, it comes with the territory. I knew that when I signed on. I trust Xander, and I trust you and Willow. It'll be okay."

"It's just...I mean, I don't think I could stand it if I lost you," Tara said, a tear sneaking into her voice.

Amy immediately pushed the book off her lap and pulled Tara into a hug. "Oh, Tara. It's okay, you're not going to lose me. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

Tara hugged her back, and for a moment the two just sat there and held each other, neither one speaking. "I'm sorry," Tara said. "Maybe I'm overreacting."

"You don't have to be sorry, Tara," Amy said. She smiled. "I like that you worry about me."

Tara smiled too. "I hope you know...what I mean is, after what happened between me and Willow, I want you to know that what I feel for you is real. That it isn't just a displacement for my feelings for Willow."

"I know that," Amy said. "I feel the same way," she said squeezing her hand again. "And I know that you don't like Xander because of how hurt Willow was when he left, but you should give him the benefit of the doubt. It was a difficult time for all of them. Xander really is a good guy, and I've known them both long enough to know that they really are meant for each other."

"Maybe you're right," Tara said. "If he has your endorsement, then he can't be all bad. But if he let's you get hurt, I'll kill him."

Amy laughed. She reached out and touched the side of Tara's face. "I love you, you know," she said.

Tara smiled as she leaned into the touch, putting her own hand on top of Amy's. "I know," she said. "And I love you."

"I know," Amy said softly, leaning in and meeting Tara's lips with her own in a gentle kiss.

8888888

Willow and Xander walked side by side through the cemetery. It was a quiet night. Almost like the forces of darkness could sense their mood and decided that they were better off steering clear. "Do you really think we can do it?" Willow asked.

"Of course," Xander said.

"I wish I could be that confident," Willow said. "But living on the Hellmouth has taught me that nothing is a sure thing."

"Willow, trust me," Xander said. "None of us will be in danger."

"What about Judith?" Willow asked. Xander looked down at her questioningly. "I just...I don't know. I guess I'm not used to going after people. I mean, this curse has been torture for her and her sister, I can't help but feel sorry for them."

"I feel sorry for them too, Wills," Xander said. "But she has to be stopped, and we'll do everything in our power to make sure she's taken alive. Our job is just to catch them, the courts decide the punishment."

"But that's just it," Willow said. "If the cops aren't equipped to catch her, what makes the courts equipped to judge her? They can't know the truth, they'll just think she's delusional and she'll end up in a mental hospital somewhere. And nobody will ever know what really happened."

Xander was silent for a moment. "Maybe," he said. "This isn't an easy thing Willow, it never is. To spend a career studying gruesome crimes, most committed by humans with souls. It still nags at me sometimes. But we do the best we can, and if someone needs help, we try to see that they get it. Maybe the courts aren't equipped, maybe the hospitals aren't equipped, hell, maybe the VCTF isn't even equipped. But it's the only system we've got, and it depends on people like Rachel, and Bailey, and..."

"You." Xander looked at her again. "I know it isn't easy Xander, and I know that you do your best." She looped her arm through his and leaned her head against his shoulder as the walked. "It's just hard."

"I know," Xander said softly. The two remained silent for a while, just walking, holding each other.

"When this is all over, and Judith Raines is in custody, what will happen?"

"Well, she'll most likely be taken to a hospital or..."

"That isn't what I meant," Willow said. Xander looked down at her. "Are you going back to Atlanta?"

Xander just stopped walking and turned to face her fully. He didn't answer her. He didn't have an answer. After a few moments of silence, Willow reached out and hugged him. She cried against his chest, and Xander just held her. "It'll be okay," Xander said, fighting tears of his own. "Please don't cry Willow. Please don't cry."

8888888

It was quiet that night. So quiet that Judith could hear her own heart beating as she made her way up the paved path of the small apartment complex where Amy Madison had agreed to meet her. She hadn't made it easy, but Judith finally managed to convince her to meet. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to come someplace like this where someone could see, but she was too close now. She had come too far to back out. She started this, and she had to finish it.

Judith found the entrance to the courtyard rather easily, and walked between the bushes that made up the entranceway. She spotted Amy sitting at the concrete table, looking around nervously. "Amy Madison," Judith called out, remaining in the shadows. Amy jumped when she heard the voice, and looked around.

"Where are you?" she asked.

Judith ignored the question. "You've come to claim your power?"

"Maybe," Amy answered cryptically.

"You know of your bloodline," Judith continued. She stepped into the light, and Amy jumped a little as she saw her come into view. "There can be no mistake." Judith drew a knife from her pocket, triangular in shape and Chumash in design. "I'm sorry, I truly am." Amy stood up the second she saw the knife and started backing away. Judith started walking toward her.

"Don't move!" Judith turned her head and saw a man standing in the doorway of the ground-floor apartment. He had a goatee beard, and he wore a suit with a long coat. He was pointing a gun at her. "Drop the knife, Judith," he said.

"No," Judith whispered. "It won't end like this. You can't stop me!" she yelled.

"But we can," Amy said. Judith turned back to her prey and saw her raising her arms, holding them apart at a 45-degree angle from each other. She began chanting, and Judith watched as a white light shot out of both of her palms, the beams shooting past her on either side. Judith whirled around and saw two young women standing behind her, one with blonde hair, the other red. Their arms were raised in the same fashion, the beams of light had struck their outstretched hands, and there was another beam between the two of them. The three of them formed a triangle, and Judith was standing in the middle of it. She whirled around again to face Amy, knife still in her hand. She heard the last words of the spell. "...We call upon the Goddess to bind thee."

"No!" Judith shouted, but it was too late. She could already feel the power draining from her. She clutched the knife tighter and made a move toward Amy, but the man's voice stopped her.

"Don't move, Judith," he said, his gun still trained on her.

"You can't do this to me!" Judith yelled out. "Do you know how many people have suffered because of this curse! It has to end!" No one answered her at first. "You don't know," she said. "You can't know. But I'm not crazy."

"We know you're not crazy Judith." Another voice this time. Female. Judith turned and saw another woman standing there, stepping out from behind a tree. She had reddish-brown hair, and wore a coat similar to the man's. "We know about the curse," she continued. "We know why you've done what you've done. We understand."

"How could you?" Judith hissed, her eyes filling with tears and she clutched the knife. "How can anyone understand the generations of suffering my family has gone through, what all our families have gone through. What is the death of five people compared to that? It has to end!"

"Judith, we can find another way," Rachel said. "You don't have to do this anymore. Please, put the knife down."

"There is no other way! Don't you think I've tried! I've looked in every spell book in existence, talked to every witch and warlock I could find! This is the only way. I didn't want to do this. I had to," she said.

"For Sara?" Rachel asked. Judith looked surprised. "You were always there for her, weren't you? To protect her. That's what big sisters are for, right?"

"I couldn't..." Judith cried. "I couldn't protect her. Goddess help me, I tried. But she still got hurt. Over and over again until the bright-eyes little girl I grew up with became such a miserable wreck of a human being that she actually begged for death. And there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it!"

"I know, Judith. I know how helpless you must feel. But this can't be the answer. All you're doing is bringing more death, more suffering."

"They didn't suffer," Judith said. "If anything, I stopped their suffering. And their sacrifice will go to save hundreds more. The young and innocent, who've never done anything to deserve such a horrible punishment."

Rachel paused. "You're pregnant, aren't you?" she asked. Xander glanced at Rachel in surprise, his gun still trained on Judith. "That's why you're doing this, because when your daughter is born she'll be the youngest and the curse will be on her."

Tears were streaming down the woman's face now full force. "I watched...I watched while Sara's life drained away. Her body was still alive, but her eyes were empty. So much misery, so much horror. She just couldn't take it anymore. I won't let that happen to my baby. I won't!"

"Your baby will be safe Judith, I promise you," Rachel said. "There doesn't have to be anymore killing."

Judith couldn't speak, she was too choked with tears, but she shook her head vehemently. Then there was silence. No one spoke, they just waited. The only sound that could be heard was Judith's ragged breathing, and the crickets chirping in the distance. Finally she spoke again. "I know the bloodline," she whispered, almost too low to be heard. "There can be no mistake." She lifted the blade and placed it against her neck. "I'm sorry," she said. "Goddess forgive me."

"No!" Rachel yelled. She was about to lunge for her when she felt Xander's hand pulling her down by the shoulder.

"Rachel, get down!" he shouted.

Rachel hit the ground and looked up in time to see an electrical discharge arc across the courtyard and strike Judith Raines in the chest. The knife fell from her hand and she hit the ground with a thud. Rachel rushed over to her immediately and put her fingers to her neck. "She's still alive."

Riley jumped down out of the tree where he was sitting, pulse rifle in hand. Xander holstered his gun walked over to where Judith lay as Buffy and Giles came out of the shadows. "Riley, what about the baby?" Xander asked.

"I don't know, I've never had to stun a pregnant woman before," he answered. "But I had it on the lowest setting, there shouldn't be any permanent damage."

"Call an ambulance," Rachel said. "I want to be sure." Riley nodded and headed into the apartment. Buffy followed.

Tara ran up to where Amy stood and pulled her into a hug. "Oh, thank Goddess you're okay," she said. Amy just hugged her girlfriend back.

Xander smiled at the couple, then leaned down to Rachel who was still make sure Judith didn't have any other injuries. "You did a good job, Rach," he said reassuringly. He knew Rachel, and he knew that inside she was beating herself up for not being able to get Judith to surrender. But some situations were just like that, and there wasn't anything that she could have done that she didn't.

"It could have gone better," she said, looking up at Xander. "You were the man with the plan. If it hadn't been for Riley, she'd probably be dead."

"And if it hadn't been for Willow, Amy and Tara," Xander said rising to his feet again and turning to the three witches. "One of us might be. You all did good."

Willow walked up and wrapped her arms around Xander. Xander hugged her back as she leaned her head against his chest. He could feel her starting to cry a little bit. "It's okay Willow, it's over now," he said.

She looked up into his face. "I know," she said. "That's why I'm crying."

8888888

The ambulance arrived first, and then the cops, and then the FBI. Until there were so many flashing lights on the street in front of Giles apartment that it looked like a UFO landing site. Buffy, Willow, Amy and Tara sat and watched through the trees as the ambulance pulled away with Judith inside. They all wore a sad expression. Riley walked up from behind and wrapped his arms around Buffy. She leaned into the embrace. "You know what the scariest part is?" Buffy asked no one in particular. "That could have been any of us," she said. "We're not so different from her. Who knows what any of us would have done faced with the same situation, to protect a child from that kind of misery. How much pain can one person take before they snap?"

The others nodded in agreement. "I hope she gets the help she needs," Willow said.

The group remained silent for a while. "And the curse continues," Amy said. "I don't know what's worse, that she almost succeeded, or that she didn't. That she came so close and the curse wasn't even lifted. It's like they died for nothing, which scares me even more to think that because if she had succeeded it would imply that there deaths were justified. Which they weren't. It's just so confusing."

"We really are much better with demons, aren't we?" Tara asked.

"I don't know," Buffy said, turning to the others. "I think we did a pretty good job." She sighed. "I just wish there was a way we could help now though."

"Maybe we can figure out a way to break the curse ourselves," Willow said.

"Don't bother." The group turned to see Xander walking up, Rachel close behind him. He had his cell phone in his hand, which he was in the process of folding up and putting back in his pocket. "I just got off with the hospital, I was making sure they had enough security for Judith." He paused. "They told me...an hour ago Sara Raines went into cardiac arrest." Xander paused again. "She's dead."

"Oh, goddess," Willow said.

"One descendant from each of the five cursed has died in Sunnydale," Xander said. "The curse is broken."

The group remained in stunned silence for a few moments, no one really knowing what to make of it all. Tara broke the silence. "May the Goddess bless you Sara Raines, and may your journey to the next realm be a peaceful one." Everyone nodded. Somehow it seemed appropriate.

"What's going to happen to her now?" Buffy asked.

"They'll keep her in the hospital a while for observation. I should be able to prolong her stay because of her pregnancy. I know a few people in high places who know...the reality of situations like these. She'll get the help she needs, I'll make sure of it."

"It's still so hard to believe," Rachel said. "Vampires, witches, curses, it's all real. I mean, it changes everything. My whole way of looking at things. Can you imagine the advances that could be made in behavioral sciences with this knowledge."

Xander opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by an annoying voice with an English accent. "Can I go now, mate? I'm bored to tears hanging around here. What did you want me fore anyway?"

Xander smiled. "Rachel, I never formally introduced you to Spike here," he said. "Rachel, Spike. Spike, Rachel. Spike, I was wondering if you could have a...conversation with Rachel. I think she'd really benefit from your view of things," Xander said, winking.

"What are you talking about? And what's wrong with your eye?" Spike asked. Xander rolled his eyes and leaned over to whisper in Spike's ear. "Oh," Spike said when Xander was finished. "Why didn't you just say so?" Spike turned to Rachel. "So, Rachel is it," he said, throwing an arm over her shoulder and leading her away. "I was wondering if you could help me, I think I have something in my eye. Could you look for me?"

"Uh, okay," Rachel answered, unsure of what exactly was going on.

"Just, look into my eyes. Look into my..." Spike continued as he led her out of earshot.

Xander smiled. "So that's what you needed Spike for," Buffy said.

"She's not ready to know what we know," Xander said. "She wouldn't be able to do her job. It's better this way."

"Wish I'd thought of that a long time ago," Buffy said. "Could have saved me some trouble."

"Yeah, well...hey!" Xander said, doing an exaggerated double take. Buffy and Willow both laughed. Xander smiled. He looked at Willow, who's smile was starting to fade. "Ah, can you guys excuse us," he said.

The others nodded and walked away, leaving just Xander and Willow standing there. Neither one said anything at first, they just kind of looked at each other. Then Xander held his arms out and Willow hugged him. She pressed her face against his chest. "I know it's different this time, because I know you're leaving and I know where you're going and where you'll be and I could just pick up a phone, but it feels like you're leaving me all over again and I don't want to cry, but Goddess, I can't help it and..."

"Shh, Willow," Xander soothed. "You're babbling." He pulled back a little to look at her. He chuckled a little bit. "We've known each other practically our entire lives, but we could never get it right. It seems like one of us was always gone when the other needed them the most. Well, I'm going to make a promise to you Willow. I know I haven't always kept my promises, but I swear to you on everything I hold sacred that as long as I draw breath I will keep this one."

"What is it Xander?" Willow asked.

"I'll love you forever Willow," he answered. "I promise." Willow hugged him again as she started to cry. "Willow, it's okay. It's going to be okay, Wills. You don't have to cry anymore."

"I can't help it Xander," she said, pulling back and wiping her face. "I love you too, more than anything."

That's when Xander noticed Rachel walking towards them. She had a confused look on her face. "You know Xander, that blonde-haired friend of yours is a weird guy. What were we talking about again?"

Xander opened his mouth to answer we he noticed a car pulling up. The doors opened and Bailey Malone and John Grant stepped out. "We were just about to go over there and explain to Bailey what the hell happened here."

Rachel turned and looked where Xander was looking. She could tell by the look on Bailey's face that he wasn't very happy. "Ah, crap," she muttered.

Rachel started walking toward him and Xander turned to Willow. "You come too Wills, you're going to want to hear this." Willow followed Xander, though she was confused as to why she would want to hear whatever explanation he gave to his superior.

"All right Harris, what the hell happened here?" Bailey asked as soon as Xander was within earshot.

"We caught the killer, Sir," Xander answered. "Her name is Judith Raines, and she's currently at Sunnydale Memorial Hospital being treated for shock."

"But how did you..."

"It'll all be in my report, Sir," Xander interrupted. "Which you will have in your hand first thing tomorrow, as well as my request for a transfer."

"What!" Bailey, Rachel and Willow all exclaimed simultaneously.

"I'm requesting to be transferred to the LA field office, effective immediately," Xander answered. He looked over to Willow who looked completely astonished.

"Xander, do you realize that there are agents who wait for years to be assigned to the VCTF," Bailey said. "And you're just going to throw all that away? Why?"

"Well, I've realized that there are some things more important," Xander said. "And I've realized that it's time for me to stop running away, and go home. So I'm staying." He looked down at Willow again. "This is my home, this is where I belong."

"Well Xander, I'm sorry to see you go. But I guess I can understand," Bailey said, looking at the way Xander and Willow were looking at each other. "I'll expect that report tomorrow." He reached out and shook Xander's hand. "Good luck son."

"Thanks Bailey," Xander said. Bailey turned and went, back into his rental car. Xander turned to Rachel know.

"I wish I could say I'm surprised," Rachel said. "I kind of thought this would happen."

"I'm sorry Rachel," Xander said.

"Don't be," she said. She pulled Xander into a hug. "As long as you're happy, that's all that matters. But I expect you to keep in touch. I want to hear about everything."

"I promise," Xander said, hugging her back. "You're a good friend Rachel Burke. You always have been."

"And I always will be," Rachel said as the hug broke. "Take care of yourself, Xander. I'll see you around."

"Bye," Xander said as he watched Rachel walk to her car. He turned back to Willow, who still looked quite shocked.

She snapped out of it thought, and smacked him on the arm. "When did you decide this?" she asked him. "And when were you going to tell me?"

"I decided about five minutes ago, when I was holding you. I realized that I wasn't going to be able to let you go. Besides, I promised I'd love you forever. And that's kind of hard to do if we're on opposite sides of the country."

"Xander are you sure about this?" she asked.

Xander reached down and cupped her face with his hand. Tilting her head up, he met her lips with his own in a searing kiss. The passion that passed between them was electric. The kiss finally broke, and the two of them looked at each other for a moment. "Positive," Xander whispered.

Willow yelped with glee and jumped up into Xander arms and wrapped her legs around him. Xander laughed as he held her to him. "Have I told you how glad I am you're back?" Willow asked with a smile.

Xander smiled too. "You know, there's an old saying that's been running through my mind ever since I got here. 'You can't go home again.' Well, I realized that I don't have to go home again. Because in my heart, I never really left. I love you Willow."

"And I love you, Xander."

And so they did, love each other that is. Xander had a promise to keep, and he wasn't about to disappoint his Willow. Not ever again. And Willow finally realized that maybe it was her turn to be happy. That maybe she'd finally have the chance. And the only question that crossed either of their minds that night as they stood there holding each other in the moonlight, was whether forever would be long enough.

 **˜fin˜**


End file.
